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Original poster

I'm in a very dark place because of tinnitus

24 replies

Whatdoyawannado · 27/10/2021 14:47

I've had it for a year now. I'm still really struggling. Don't get enjoyment out of anything anymore. I just want some peace and quiet but it's always there mithering me and tainting everything I do with no end in sight.

OP posts:
Pinktops · 27/10/2021 15:03

I have had tinnitus for over 30 years. When I was first diagnosed with it I thought I would never be able to cope or get used to it.
At the time I rang a tinnitus helpline and was given a piece of advice that I still use today. I was told “ you will always have it, you will always hear it but don’t listen to it”
I still follow that today, I don’t listen to it and it has really helped me. It takes a while to train yourself not to listen to it but it worked for me and I hope it helps you too 💐

DoesHePlayTheFiddle · 27/10/2021 15:06

I've had it for at least 56 years. It gets louder and my general hearing reduces. One day it will be all that's left.

DoesHePlayTheFiddle · 27/10/2021 15:07

Clearly, I'm in a 'dark place' too, OP.

Distract yourself. Low music/radio in the background. Something engaging to do.

NewspaperTaxis · 27/10/2021 15:11

What kind of tinnitus? They're not all the same. I have it but it comes and goes, provoked by alcohol, cheese, agitating food... Too much protein can do it.
But it was linked to having a sort of lingering flu brought on by doing the Atkins diet too heavily, along with drinking port (no idea why) and not too healthy living. When a low-level bug is a factor, a paracetamol or two before bed would help, as the tinnitus would get worse as the body temperature would rise at night.
A low-level murmering CD of some music at night would help too, it would take one's mind out of one's head.
Other tinnitus is caused by damage to the tiny hairs in the ear, but mine wasn't like that - the CD music would help though still.

Obviously you notice tinnitus when there is peace and quiet, when there is street noise or kerfuffle you notice it less.

LanisHouseLot · 27/10/2021 15:15

I read recently that CBT is actually really helpful with tinnitus, might be worth looking in to?

MarcelineMissouri · 27/10/2021 15:17

Have you been to the drs? I have special tinnitus hearing aids (I do have a mild hearing loss anyway) that play low level noise eg ocean sounds. They work amazingly well - I can easily tune out the sound of the hearing aids and I am not aware of the tinnitus at all. It is my understanding that they are available to help with tinnitus, not just if there’s also hearing loss so it might be worth looking in to.

I have had on and off tinnitus for many years but it became permanent about 3 years ago. Like you I was in a total panic and tears over never having silence again but certainly for me I have found it’s no longer a big deal - sometimes I’m not aware of it at all now. You do learn to live with it after a while x

Lynne1Cat · 27/10/2021 16:03

I've had Tinnitus for 18 years now. It's there all day, every day. Most of the time, I can ignore it - being busy and/or being outdoors helps. When the house is quiet, it's more noticable.

AnxiousWeirdo · 27/10/2021 16:07

I was born with tinnitus and you really do have to learn not to listen to it, I can hear it all the time obviously but if I tune into it it's so much worse. You have my sympathies

Pinkspecs · 27/10/2021 16:14

I know how you feel, the first two years were the worst for me, I was so upset I would never hear silence again.
I found putting in earplugs helped me when it was at its worse as sounds would make it worse like the hair dryer or the hoover.
Your brain gets used to it in the end and you learn to tune it out more.

iklboogiemaninthecloset · 27/10/2021 16:16

Sorry to hear this. I have tinnitus too - part of Ménière's disease. It's worse when I'm tired or stressed. I found Alexa playing ocean / storm sounds next to the bed helpful at night to drown it out a bit. Background music on the radio during the day helps too.

As PP have said, you do learn to live with it. Good luck.

MrsSamRowley · 27/10/2021 16:22

Chiming in because I've also had tinnitus now for 11 years - it just came on one day and it was all I could hear and I found it MADDENING. I was signed off work and told by an ENT specialist that I would most likely have it forever but would learn to live with it and I cried like a baby for weeks. But now I barely notice it, except when it's quiet or I'm really tired. Time really is a healer. Sending love xxx

FMSucks · 27/10/2021 16:29

Another sufferer here too. I got mine after the flu when I was 21 so have it over 25 years now. I was really in a bad place with it for the first year. I didn't know if I could cope with it. As previous posters have said, you learn to not listen to it. I don't notice it anymore except when I'm overtired, stressed or not feeling well. It's pretty bad then. I can imagine that CBT could work really well as it should train your brain to not notice it as much, which I've somehow managed to do over the years.

I wish you well OP. It will get easier xx

ThedaBara · 27/10/2021 16:37

www.google.com/amp/s/lifehacker.com/this-weird-trick-might-give-you-brief-relief-from-your-1794093023/amp

Have seen this technique floating around that apparently works for about half of sufferers

romdowa · 27/10/2021 16:38

I've had it for 16 years since I was 17 and you really do just get used to it . When at home I usually always have a tv/radio on , even when going to sleep as other wise the ringing would keep me awake. During the day though I find I can zone it out far easier

Original poster
Whatdoyawannado · 27/10/2021 17:30

Thanks for the replies. I'm hoping it'll get easier to manage over time but still pretty shit. I have had better days/weeks where it's been easier to cope with but having a bad week at the moment.

OP posts:
eatthepineapple · 28/10/2021 07:37

I hope I'm ok to comment on this as I'm not a sufferer myself but my husband suffers and is finding it really hard at the moment to cope. He has had it for a few years already but it has got worse over the past year and is really getting him down. You all have my sympathies. If anyone has any advice of how I can best support him then that is much appreciated but really I am just following with interest to hear others' experiences x

Original poster
Whatdoyawannado · 28/10/2021 09:51

@eatthepineapple has he been checked for hearing loss? That can make tinnitus worse and can be helped with a hearing aid.

OP posts:
Original poster
Whatdoyawannado · 28/10/2021 09:55

Also, maybe get him to contact the British Tinnitus Association. He can chat to them on the phone or via web chat and their website is very informative.

OP posts:
SleepingStandingUp · 28/10/2021 10:03

Offering empathy op. I'm always amazed when people say they've had it for X years because I can't remember it starting, I feel like there's always been noises there. I remember having released hearing tests as a child and it being so hard to differentiate between the internal and external beeps.

In the day I can largely tune it out or just kinda acknowledge it's there but it's usually quieter than external noise so I can tune it out. At night white noise or classical music helps, but I've also found tuning into the noise as a kind of meditation helps me fall asleep sometimes too.

I find the thump thump noise i my ears from my heart worse, that makes me want to murder someone as I can't ignore it

Original poster
Whatdoyawannado · 28/10/2021 10:43

The noises in my ears I don't tend to notice unless I'm in a quiet room but I have an ultra high pitched electrical head hiss that can't be covered by any other external sounds. Drives me mental.

OP posts:
Notgettingbetter · 28/10/2021 12:09

I don't have tinnitus (though I have had brief spells in the past) but I imagine it can be absolute torture. I really feel for all of you who are suffering with it ❤️

eatthepineapple · 28/10/2021 17:15

@Whatdoyawannado thanks. Yes he has been tested for hearing loss and his hearing is apparently fine, or at least not anything concerning. However he does think that this time round it is getting worse - he has had it for over 10 years but it seems to ramp up the volume every few years or so, after he has become accustomed to/less bothered by it. This often seems to coincide with stressful times but also due to loud noises. Last summer we went away in a noisy campervan for 3 weeks and it has ramped it right up and it hasn't really got better or less distressing since then. Thanks for the tip though, I will look into the tinnitus association thing

Ibizafun · 28/10/2021 22:45

I have had tinnitus most of my life, increasing as my hearing decreased. At the time I followed the advice on here and ignored it and that worked really well.. I just wouldn’t let it bother me. My deafness bothered me more.

DoesHePlayTheFiddle please don’t say that one day it will be all that’s left!!! Not the case unless you wish it to be. I now have cochlear implants, my tinnitus disappeared overnight and my hearing is so good now I don’t even think about it anymore. I am sure the same result can be achieved by effective hearing aids, although I appreciate when they come off at night the tinnitus starts again.

KILNAMATRA · 28/10/2021 23:12

I gave it too. When working listen to calming music.. be outside, try to enjoy your life snd ignore it. Choose not to listen to it.. get calm app listen to that.. I mix mine up with vertigo at times… anti anxiety meds from helped me

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