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Mental health

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Can anyone share strategies for snapping quickly out of negative spiral/really low mood.

27 replies

ToooOldForThis · 05/10/2021 17:53

I get hit more and more frequently by real paralysing moments, where all I really want to do is cry or crawl into bed. Really low and despairing. I have lots going on and understand long term what needs done, but short term I can't go bursting into tears at work or walking out of meetings, and I need to look after my kids, the house etc.

I tend to try to take deep breaths and do a lot of swearing internally or under my breath when it hits me....not particularly helpful or scientific!

Can anyone give me some things to try? I'm finding it harder and harder to chase away the negativity

OP posts:
LaBellina · 05/10/2021 17:56

Have you contacted your GP yet about what’s going? By the sounds of it, you’re on the verge of a burn out, talking from experience here unfortunately.

Short term solution: Bach rescue spray. It’s a homeopathic solution for acute very stressful moments and it worked for me years ago.

www.hollandandbarrett.com/shop/product/nelsons-rescue-remedy-spray-60082650?skuid=080142

LaBellina · 05/10/2021 17:57

Sorry it worked for me years ago when I had moments of overwhelming anxiety

ToooOldForThis · 05/10/2021 18:01

Oh thank you! That's perfect. Don't know why I didn't think of that, I used to use the drops when I was younger.
No I haven't seen GP, kind of on the "to do" list, but I need some coping strategies short term!

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LaBellina · 05/10/2021 18:04

Please contact them, I had the same symptoms as you and ignored them until I mentally crashed one day, couldn’t work for months and needed a lot of therapy to recover. Your mental health is just as important as your fysical health. Please look after yourself Flowers

ToooOldForThis · 05/10/2021 19:35

Thank you so much. I do feel it's imminent tbh, altho then I have a good day or part of day and forget

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PhoebeFriends · 05/10/2021 21:27

I have to walk - long and fast - problem I s it’s time consuming but stomping and breathing helps me breathe.

Cheermonger · 05/10/2021 21:30

I try really hard to think of 5 positive things every morning and every evening even if it’s something daft like my teeth feel really clean or I saw a nice flower. It does work, it’s a habit like a retraining and it’s made a world of difference to my mood. Hope you feel better soon xxx

ToooOldForThis · 05/10/2021 22:45

@PhoebeFriends I feel moving helps me too, it's not always an option at work, but I always feel better after a good stomp like you say.

@Cheermonger that is a good habit...Do you write it down? Or just run through it in your head?

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Evesgarden · 05/10/2021 22:48

Yes get your trainers on and go out for a very long power walk with music blasting in your ear phones. Go after work/before work if you can.

Its the last thing you will want to do but it really does work. if only just to take the edge off Flowers

SlB09 · 05/10/2021 22:57

I really find yoga helps - but out to a class, in the house isn't the same. Or like others a long power walk.
Usi g calm app for mightime stories really helps me, also using the breathing box method (if that's what it's called!) breathe in for 6/7 or 8 Seconds, hold for the same, breathe out for the same then hold for the same again - imagine drawing the sides of a box while you do it if that makes sense!!
Kalms lavender capsules have some effect for me.
Sometime u just gave to force myself not to think!

ToooOldForThis · 05/10/2021 23:04

Thank you all! I do a lot of exercise which always lifts my mood.

But what I really wondered about was in those exact moments of panic/despair, how can I snap out of it?

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Frustrated1234 · 05/10/2021 23:21

Loud happy music. And move - even if it’s swaying like a crazy person. I find the more I sit paralysed, the worse I feel. Then I start to feel bad about having sat paralysed for ages.

PhoebeFriends · 06/10/2021 06:35

Elastic band/ hair band on wrist - pull to snap out of the feeling.

Iveputmyselfonthenaughtystep · 06/10/2021 06:46

Is loud, positive songs for me. I got through the breakdown of my marriage by listening to obviously loud music.

I even made myself a stereotype and included Gloria gaynor in the mix WinkGrin
Also basic care - lots of water, lots of fruit and veg. Small things to look forward to. Exercise.

But do contact a professional too

Iveputmyselfonthenaughtystep · 06/10/2021 06:46

*obnoxiously. Not obviously...

ToooOldForThis · 06/10/2021 06:53

Thank you again! I do music at home but can't at work...I like the hairband idea going to try that!

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TerrifiedandWorried · 06/10/2021 07:01

If I'm in meetings I make notes using the first initial of each word. So if what's going through my head is "oh god I can't take any more of this I want to scream I feel hideous help me" my note will say "ogictamotiwtsifhhm". It really helps to get it out!

But please do address the root causes and get help. It is horrible to feel like that and there is help available. Hope you feel better soon.

Sarahlou63 · 06/10/2021 07:06

Square breathing is good for when you're in a meeting as you can do it without anyone else being aware -

Also try the STOPP technique - you'll need to practice it a bit but once you have got it, you can use it to disassociate yourself from your emotional response and stay in control -

ToooOldForThis · 06/10/2021 08:53

Oh these sound really helpful thank you! I love the meeting idea that will be getting used ASAP, and I will watch watch videos tonight.
One of my issues is that I feel very alone so actually just having you taking the time to reply is amazing, thank you!

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3luckystars · 06/10/2021 08:54

Do something nice for someone else and have a dioralyte. Good luck.

ShutTheFrontDoor6344 · 06/10/2021 08:59

One trick that works for me when I begin the negative self talk is staring at one tiny thing like a droplet of water or a mark on the wall, it can be literally anything. When I'm staring at one particular thing, I find it extremely difficult to over think. This coupled with an upbeat song (with no words, I'm prone to maladaptive daydreaming if a song has words) tends to get me out of a spiral before it properly starts. Worth trying as it was a game changer for me. The staring at one spot is great as it can be done anywhere.

chezneztea · 06/10/2021 12:34

@ToooOldForThis

Thank you all! I do a lot of exercise which always lifts my mood.

But what I really wondered about was in those exact moments of panic/despair, how can I snap out of it?

Try something that grounds you like brushing the kids hair, brushing the dog, walking on the grass with no shoes on.

Sounds mad but my therapist suggested that.

LadyCatStark · 06/10/2021 12:51

Sertraline, that’s it!

MagpiePi · 06/10/2021 13:01

Things that help me are
singing along to an upbeat song
getting outside particularly in the sunshine (have just got back from a 10 minute walk)
watching a video or listening to a podcast that I know will make me laugh (the Bigus Dickus scene in Life of Brian!)
a good weights session at the gym
take a vitamin D supplement

I'm not making any assumptions here, but could you be peri-menopausal? I've recently started on HRT and my overall mood and energy levels have improved massively, plus the PMT downs and mood swings have just about gone.

It does sound like you are getting overwhelmed by life though and I would agree with others who say go and see your GP.

FSVin · 06/10/2021 14:23

I find self-massage (like the one below) helpful for bringing me out of those moments. Standard CBT type grounding techniques (like, looking around the room to count colours etc.) don't really work for me, but I do find touch grounding. You probably wouldn't want to start doing it in the middle of a meeting (although just a few subtle shoulder squeezes could potentially help a little) but it's the kind of thing you could do with a five minute break in the loo.