Lonely

[Lelmo]

Name changing for this. Struggling with lots of things in my life. Covid led to husband losing job and us losing our house. Were made homeless and given a housing association house 40 minutes away from family. I have two young DC. One nearly 3, the other 5 months. Dc1 is having difficulties with behaviour at home, at nursery and just in general. Extremely hyperactive and heavy handed with other kids, completely unable to listen and being in general very disruptive. Have reached out to HV but with covid there is a long waiting list etc. I feel isolated due to the behavioural problems. I feel like I can't take him to the park or any other situations with unfamiliar children, due to other judgy looks/ comments from parents when he goes out of control. Nothing I've tried works to deter him. It's like he gets in a frenzy and nothing can control him. Baby is high needs too. I'm stuck at home crying most days. I've never felt like this before and I feel awful saying it. I love my children but I miss being near my family and in my hometown. I'm not familiar enough with this area and even if I were to go out there is nothing around. I'm trying to get a swap to be nearer to family but no one wants such a rural village. I feel lost and keeping this to myself is killing me.

I can totally see why you are feeling so low. Going through redundancy, losing your home and having a baby are all very stressful abs you've had all 3 quite close together.

Does your DH know how you feel? I'd start by telling him, if you can.

I'd start by speaking to the PANDAS Foundation about how you are feeling. They are open until 10pm tonight although the earlier you call the better chance you've got of speaking to someone.

Then in the morning I'd book a double appointment with the GP, if they ask if it's an emergency, yes it is.

Tell the GP how your DC1 is behaving abs ask for a referral for him to be assessed for ADHD/ASD, just to get those ruled out.

Also tell the GP how isolated you are and how much you're crying. The GP might offer talking therapy or ADs or both. What they won't do is report you to SS.

Take your DH along to appointment with the or have him on the call if you can. It's a sad fact that most GPS listen more and are less dismissive if Dad is there too.

While you are waiting for the referral try Toddler Taming with DC1.

Once you've got yourself in a better place you can think about applying for the free childcare that DC1 will be entitled to after his 3rd birthday, doing that house swap abs maybe going back to work and sanding a deposit for a rental closer to where you want to be

How are you doing this evening @Lelmo?