Afraid to start on antidepressants

[Fertility87]

I have quite major pms. For 2 weeks of every month I am depressed and find life hard. I also suffer from anxiety. For the other 2 weeks, I feel pretty stable and happy. The yo-yo is exhausting. Lately, my pms has gotten worse - the sort of isolation of the past 1.5 years has made the depression harder to deal with.

I am in talk therapy, but often wonder if I need “more”. I’ve tried mediating, keeping a gratitude journal, yoga, sports, and they do help, but I still find those two weeks before my period really tough.

But I’m scared of getting hooked on antidepressants or that they’d change me, etc. I have always tried to cope without them. I don’t love taking any pills.

Tell me about your experience taking them! Did they change the way you were in any negative way? Or were your experiences positive? (I have a creative sort of job, and I once heard that they take the edge off creativity - maybe that’s bullshit?! - but it’s forever scared me!)

OP I've been resisting antidepressants for 15 years,

I finally took the plunge only two weeks ago.

My life has been changed so much - for the better.

I cannot believe I waited this long, it has been life changing for me.

What made me take them was to Think of it this way - if I had high blood pressure, or diabetes or any other medical condition for that fact I would take medication without hesitation. So why because it's mental are you reluctanct? It's purely because I sadly the social stigma attached to it.

Once I logically thought about it like this - I took them and I haven't looked back.

I can now do my job, I don't have depressive daily thoughts and have started enjoying things I stopped.

You will not regret it.

Also like you I tried EVRYTHING! Excercise, meditation, diet but nothing helped my depression like sertraline.

Life changing.

I’ve not had any negative effects tbh, apart from one that made my head sweat. It was literally dripping off my chin! Changed to a different one & I’ve been on that one for a few years with no problems.
I don’t feel the have changed me. I’m not ‘hooked’ on them, there have been times when I have spent long periods not on AD. However, we have lots of family health issues & disabilities to contend with so, without the AD things can feel very bleak. The AD make things more manageable but they haven’t changed me as a person, other than to make me less depressed.

I’m another one that has always done meditation, yoga etc btw.

I used to take 150 mg of sertraline and I didn't like the feeling it gave me so I reluctantly restarted them when things got bad with my anxiety in the first lockdown. I only take 25 now and it just keeps the anxiety at bay but I don't feel different.

OP,
I too was terrified to take them, that they would make me a trapped zombie. In fact, they just give you a break from yourself. Less ruminating, less worrying, more content. I’m currently on them for the second time, no problem coming off them before once I cut down slowly. You can always give it a go for six weeks.

@Myusernameisnotmyusernameno I take only 25mg and even such a small dose have changed my life.

i too was terrified of taking them! mainly becausei didnt want any of the nasty side effects they say you can get!

now im so glad i did, they really do help:) x

Also I didn't initially get side effects when I started on 50mcg and it was horrible for the first week. If you are given sertraline I'd recommend starting on 25mcg

[quote ttcissoboring]@Myusernameisnotmyusernameno I take only 25mg and even such a small dose have changed my life.[/quote]
Oh really? In what way? When I went back on them I had a really tough couple of weeks but I don't feel any different now.

@Myusernameisnotmyusernameno I'm exactly the same person but without daily negative thoughts thinking it's pointless being alive. I now enjoy things I never used to and the biggest improvement has been at work.

I have massive brain fog and my job is highly responsible and stressful so there's no room for mental illness to perform the job to the standard required. I was close to quitting as the mental illness was preventing me from being able to think clearly enough to do the job well but now all brain fog has gone and I am happy at work again and able to see and set goals and excited to achieve them.

Before the AD I'd post regularly on MN to say what's the point in life and no I don't have that feeling.

Has made such a huge difference I'm actually scared to come off them 😂

Honestly, it's fine. It's like taking any pill, or medication, like paracetamol. You have the option to help yourself - take it. Give a trial for 3 months and then reevaluate. It really isnt as big if a deal as it is in your head. And yes I have been there too. I am the same old me I was, I am in No way a different person at all in the slightest. It's just a mild tweak to your chemistry to help you along. Accept the pills and enjoy your life!

[quote ttcissoboring]@Myusernameisnotmyusernameno I'm exactly the same person but without daily negative thoughts thinking it's pointless being alive. I now enjoy things I never used to and the biggest improvement has been at work.

I have massive brain fog and my job is highly responsible and stressful so there's no room for mental illness to perform the job to the standard required. I was close to quitting as the mental illness was preventing me from being able to think clearly enough to do the job well but now all brain fog has gone and I am happy at work again and able to see and set goals and excited to achieve them.

Before the AD I'd post regularly on MN to say what's the point in life and no I don't have that feeling.

Has made such a huge difference I'm actually scared to come off them 😂[/quote]
Aah sorry I was reading it like they have affected you negatively! That's amazing. I'm so glad you feel better. Yes 25mg has made me feel much better than I was. More like a 'normal' happy person

I too had horrific PMS. Prozac saved my sanity, my relationship and possibly my life. There’s no way my (extremely patient) DH could have coped with much more of my crazy irrational behaviour. I meant to stay on them for 6 months which turned into 2 years. But I’m ok with that. The only thing I would say is that they “levelled” me out. I didn’t have extreme lows but I also didn’t have highs either. DH says I didn’t laugh when I was on them. But they don’t have to be forever. Wean off gradually when you feel ready. X

Oh wow thank you for these comments so far! I’m glad I’m not the only one who had previously been afraid to take them. I’ve been resisting taking them for my whole adult life, really!

My biggest fears are not being able to do my job the same - even though, every month, I struggle with that anyway - and feeling flattened out. But my motivation is on the floor at the moment, and the constant thinking ahead of “next month’s pms episode” is exhausting.

@Spudina

I too had horrific PMS. Prozac saved my sanity, my relationship and possibly my life. There’s no way my (extremely patient) DH could have coped with much more of my crazy irrational behaviour. I meant to stay on them for 6 months which turned into 2 years. But I’m ok with that. The only thing I would say is that they “levelled” me out. I didn’t have extreme lows but I also didn’t have highs either. DH says I didn’t laugh when I was on them. But they don’t have to be forever. Wean off gradually when you feel ready. X

How’s your pms now? Or are you still on them?

I’ve found ADs and the Mirena coil life-changing in terms of managing PMS, as well as dealing with anxiety and depression. I have a job where I have to be creative and think on my feet - I’ve never felt that the medication has affected this. Insomnia, anxiety and intrusive thoughts all had a much worse impact! I would take medication if I had diabetes, high bp or a thyroid problem without a second thought. I don’t have any issue with taking ADs to manage a mental illness that has partly been caused by a chemical imbalance. What I would say is that most people have a good fit with a particular AD and it might take a while to find the right one for you.
Best wishes and

@Fertility87

Oh wow thank you for these comments so far! I’m glad I’m not the only one who had previously been afraid to take them. I’ve been resisting taking them for my whole adult life, really!

My biggest fears are not being able to do my job the same - even though, every month, I struggle with that anyway - and feeling flattened out. But my motivation is on the floor at the moment, and the constant thinking ahead of “next month’s pms episode” is exhausting.

it will honestly help you and give you a boost also and wont make you feel as bad as you probably feel now x

@Fertility87 I have very little PMS these days. I get really pissed off with the state of the house for a couple of days and am an quite easily annoyed, but nothing too bad. I have since had two depressive episodes that needed treating in my 30s. I was pregnant one of the times and didn’t know it, so I think that was mainly hormones. I took medications both times but have been off them for about 3 years. I accept that my mental health will always be a weakness and if I needed medication again I wouldn’t hesitate. Hope you feel better soon. Xx

Also Op, if you take them and find the ones you are prescribed don’t suit, just speak to the dr again and try a different one.