So annoyed with my self (SH trigger warning)

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I have been having negative thoughts for ages and on meds/having CBT. For ages these thoughts have just been exactly that end have not acted upon anything.
However this last week I have taken medication (not to end my life, I have never been suicidal) but just to make things go away, made me drowsy and spaced out and not feel so crap for a while. I have also made cuts to my arms which made me feel better for a while but now I'm so annoyed I didn’t ask for help when I knew I needed it. Which in turn has made me feel more down and worry it’s a bit of a vicious circle I’ve got my self in.

Hi. Don't have much advice. But trust me that the self-blame and hate about the SH and pills isn't gonna help you. Hey, we all falter. You recognize that neither of those things were ultimately good coping skills, so that's a great thing!

And it is hard sometimes to sort out when you need help and when you can figure it out on your own. It probably takes practice, too. Don't be so hard on yourself.

You are in cbt, so probably have a therapist that hopefully you trust. I'd probably tell him/her what you did. Let them help you explore exactly what lead up to/why you did those things, and maybe that'll help you with a plan or skills for the future?

And I'd be careful taking stuff to space out etc. People become massive addicts on drugs and alcohol and even dependent on "harmless" medications this way, which will just add another problem.

See it as a bump in the road, and keep going. Be honest with how and what you were thinking and feeling that lead to it. Don't dwell on it though. I think the dwelling on shit can make it worse sometimes.
Take care!!

Has anyone managed to find a way to stop these thoughts. I’m finding my self spending a lot of time thinking about self harm, it probably enters my head 5 plus times a day and even if I don’t act on these thoughts every time it’s hard to be sure I can guarantee I can keep my self safe.