ADHD and difficulty speaking.

[Bythemillpond]

Ds has got a referral for an adhd test from the gp. He is really not great at speaking to people. His mind goes blank and he panics and he ended up handing the phone to me to speak on his behalf to the GP.
He is worried that when it comes to the appointment he won’t be able to explain what his problems are on his own.

Any tips on how to help him or can I go in with him and explain.
He is an adult teen and painfully shy

Hi OP, just a thought but would it help if he wrote down what he wanted to say? At least that way he’d have something to refer to visually. Another way would be to rehearse some of what he’d like to cover.
Best of luck.

That is a good idea.

We did rehearse a bit what to say to the GP for his appointment because he is terrible speaking to people but he could only say hello and It is about ADHD and then he panicked and said my mum will tell you.

Then I had to do the talking

Write things down, then he can hand the information over or read it out.

The specialist needs to see your son in his normal state, not in a rehearsed state. Remember they'll have seen it all before, there's nothing to be embarrassed about. They'll be patient, and they'll be observing as well as listening.

You might want to look up masking, what many people with ASD/ ADHD do to play down their symptoms. Whilst the specialist will be aware that the patient might do this, they really need to see him in his normal state.

Try not to overthink it. He needs to be as natural as possible. He's not giving a performance.

For the referral, write down what he wants to say. There is a good guide on aadduk - basically you go in and say I am having some concerns about symptoms I am having and I would like to be referred to an adhd specialist.

Take the diagnostic criteria list and take just an example or two of each criteria. You don't need to fit every one. If the doctor asks which symptoms, bring this out.

Take a copy of the nice guidelines. If the doctor says that referral is unnecessary, adults can't get medication or anything like that say nevertheless, I would like a referral to discuss with a specialist and show the nice guidelines.

If the doctor says there are no specialists in the area, ask for an out of area referral and who would be the closest.

This should get him the result he wants. Then when he goes to see the actual specialist he doesn't need to take anything except perhaps that annotated symptom list as a starting point.

Oh sorry. Now I've actually read your post I see you've got past that stage already.

I agree that the specialist won't mind and will be able to steer the conversation in a useful direction. However a bullet pointed list or list of symptoms/problems he's worried about is absolutely fine to bring and won't come across as "rehearsed" or anything like that. I think I took one to my first appointment.

He might be given a form to fill in before the appointment anyway which is a kind of self rating questionnaire. Otherwise they will give it to him at the appointment to take away.

I think that advice is good when we get to the face to face meeting. It will be written down on his questionnaire anyway but the next step is another telephone conversation.

I have recently been through it and it is about answering some questions to see if you really need to be referred.
I can’t remember what the woman was talking about as I just answered a question and carried on talking. I don’t think I let her get a word in edgeways as I blurted 55 years of pent up frustration out and I think she just let me talk for almost the whole telephone conversation butting in when I took a breath with a quick question.

We will write it all down and hopefully he will get over to her his “symptoms” and “issues”

We are going through the adult mental health unit. Is there anyway of asking for a particular psychiatrist.

The guy I had when he was doing my assessment let me prattle on and was a lot more relaxed about how I was answering the questions where as dd got someone who shut her down when she was answering the question if she thought she was going off at a tangent when dd was trying to explain anything
But then anything where it was a yes or no answer she would delve in deeper and then dismiss the answer as irrelevant

I.e dd was asked if she had any speeding fines.
Answer Yes. She has 6 points on her licence and has been banned because of the amount of speeding fines she has had

What speeds were you going. When dd said she dismissed it and altered her answer to no as they weren’t in her opinion going over the speed limit by that much.

Dd is refusing to see this woman again and is in all likelihood not going to end up bring tested.
I can’t see how Ds will handle this sort of questioning and picking apart his answers. It will finish him.

Thats really wierd. How is being banned not a big deal.

I think she decided that dd was going to sell the drugs when she got given them so was never going to listen to her.
Apparently she gave her a lecture on how the drugs were not to be sold and they were for her own personal medication before she had even started.

I have heard its common - ish for students to sell them so they dont always like to prescribe. Wierd to assume though.

MistySkiesAfterRain

Dd isn’t a student.