3 kids under 4 and struggling

[FairyWings4]

I'm wasn't sure whether to post here or in post-natal health but here goes.

I feel utterly overwhelmed and fed up with my life. I am welling up writing this because I have 3 children (all under 4 with the youngest at 5 months old) who I adore but I'm just so tired of it all. We do get some help with the kids and have a great support network. In many ways we are lucky to have this and live in the countryside but this low mood is taking any appreciation away from me.

I speak to my therapist regularly and DH is very supportive but I'm finding it increasingly hard to keep going on a daily basis. I've started thinking what's the point of it all, life will always be like this and I'll never be successful in my chosen career etc etc. Mornings are the hardest, I dread the day starting and literally can't move until DH brings me coffee.

It feels/sounds like PND and I feel myself falling deeper and deeper into a black hole. Thoughts of suicide come and go, which make me feel even worse. I'm not sure what else I can do, just looking for some words of support I guess. x

It’s really worth you going to the doctor. Pregnancy causes huge chemical changes and it’s very common for mums to be affected. Doctors are very understanding about pd or d - it can be a relief just to make a step towards getting better. They also barely raise an eyebrow at suicide so just be honest - it’s a symptom to them rather than ‘taboo’.

Having had depression and fibromyalgia/cfs I’d say there are a couple of things to boost your energy. 1. Getting enough sleep, with a regular routine 2. Exercise- it took me at least a week of doing Pilates daily to get any ‘boost’ from it, but once I did it was great to do first thing and sort of get me on the right track for the day. 3. Eat well, take probiotics to make sure your giving your body all it needs nutritionally/to digest.

Do you get time to yourself? Sometimes you just need to be assertive and be clear your taking it 😀 It’s daunting asking for help but if you have the support it’s nice to have those that care help out - they just need to know you need it.

You will get there x

I agree op, I would start by making an appointment with your gp to discuss how you are feeling.

Secondly, if you can possibly arrange for some support to give you a total break (not just childcare so you can catch up on chores) I would do this ASAP.

Be open with friends/family/your partner how you have been feeling lately and reach out to your support network as much as you feel able to, it's nothing to be ashamed of and they will want to help you through this.

I also second that exercise, sleep and good food/hydration are good for boosting mood and physical health which in turn can really help you manage your mental health (sorry I know this is easier said than done when you have children whose needs take priority over yours!).

Go easy on yourself too. Lower your standards. Hang in there, it will get easier