Depressed friend pushing me away

[Sloulou88]

Hi,

I am at loss. I have a friend of around 17-18 years - always been close and always got eachother but went our seperate ways.

recently he got back in touch and things got back to how they used to - although neither of us are able to act due to having our own families now etc.

anyway he opened up to me regarding his troubles, depression and other mental health problems and decided to quit his medication. Obviously despite advice not to he has and has not doing so well- has become extremely depressed.

he went quiet for a week or so and then said he needs space and he pushes away people that are important to him and people close to him when he’s like this and it’s not personal. Another week passes one more message saying it’s him not me.

ive dropped in a few times since and nothing since and now he’s not even opening my messages. I don’t want to loose a friend so dear to me but I also wander if it is personal and I am actually being ghosted. How can I reach out to my friend when they won’t even read what I send - I just want them to be ok :land to know I care dearly

It's probably nothing personal. When I get really down, I find it so exhausting to maintain friendships. I could send a simple text to say HI, but the response text from a friend requires effort and entry from me to respond. Effort and energy that I just don't have. So I don't get in touch at all during these periods. its shit for friends and shit for me. I know ha e a very small core group of friends and we are all similar so we don't the offence at lack of messages. Every now and then send your friend a text to keep in.touch - he will appreciate it when he's depressed and respond when he feels well enough

Able to act? You sound like you want a romantic relationship.
This person isn’t in a place where they can consider that.
They don’t want to be responsible for you and your feelings. Leave them for now.
The odd text is fine. Checking if they’ve read your messages is a bit stalkery.

Thank you- I dropped a message today saying I’m here when if he wants to chat. But if patience and understanding then I guess!

I don’t want a romantic relationship- there was a time yes but he is a friend and a long time friend - I only noticed the messages from the weekend were not read when I went on to send w check in message today.