Homesick only 40 mins away, why?

[YellowSun567]

I've been living 40 minutes (30 miles) away from my childhood home for 4 years. I moved into my partner's house (now husband). I've tried to settle here but I always long to go back. I am homesick. I keep thinking it will get better but it isn't.

It's ridiculous as it's only 40 mins away. Does this indicate some undiagnosed mental health issue? Is this strange to be so homesick as 30 miles is not a long way? If so, does anyone have any tips on how to get over this? The feeling of homesickness that I have is a 'dread' feeling. I get a dry mouth and sick feeling in the pit of my stomach.

Bump

Is it homesickness as such, or a sense of belonging, being able to say hello to friends on the street, have a feeling of familiarity. It is very hard to build up a social life at the moment, but did you manage before?

Are you in a worse area? We moved temporarily to a worse area and that had an effect on me.

Even though it is only 40 minutes it is still a change for you.

My husband would say it's a better area! It probably is more 'affluent' (so I guess 'better' in that regard) It's rural though, and I'm used to living in the suburbs of a big city, so yes I guess it might be the sense of community I'm missing. I've been here almost 4 years and have never settled! I've just had a baby and the feeling of homesickness is so much worse now!

I think having a baby really exposes your emotions. Plus by changing from suburbs to rural is a bigger change than moving say from city to city.

Is there something like a mum and baby group where you could get to know other mothers? It is incredibly hard in the first days of having a baby.

Do your relatives come over?

I have lived all over. And outside the uk.

I'm back home now since having kids. I just feel better being close to my family.

My area (where I grew up in and now live) is technically worse than any I have lived in but the people are lovely. There is a community. I enjoy being home.

If I won the lottery I wouldn't move. I'd just buy a better house. With more rooms so I could have my own floor to ceiling library with a ladder.

@namcybotwinbloom I love a good library or even a reading nook (misses point of thread) as you were.

Yes, it is hard to replicate where you feel you belong.

Sorry op I was just trying to get across that your close family well it's good to be close.

My parents are getting on. I want to support them.

I like the people in my street
We are a community.

We are not in and out of each other's pockets but we are all there if you need anything.

Thank you x Yes it must be the sense of community and belonging that I miss so much! My home area which I miss so much sounds similar to yours, a community there for each other. Familiar people not in and out of peoples pockets but always there when you need them. I am also really close to my family and they all live mainly back in that area.

@namcybotwinbloom so true. You've hit the nail on the head there. "It's hard to replicate where you feel you belong".