Grief and depression

[Mymapuddlington]

I’ve recently lost both my parents, I have a disabled son and I just want to sleep all day and night, I have no energy for him which makes me feel worse, like a terrible mother. I just want my mum and dad. They were both late fifties and although I knew they would die at some point I was expecting them to be a lot older.
I just don’t know how to drag myself out of this depression. Any tips?

I'm sorry to hear that. It must be so hard for you. I don't really have any advice but didn't want to read and run

Really sorry to hear of your loss op. Have you been to the doctors about your depression. I tried many tablets until I found one that worked. Sertraline saved me I have the energy again to look after my children and clean my house. Also maybe some counselling to help while you are grieving.

Thank you, I just feel very lost and I know I need to do better for my son I just don’t know how

Id really recommend listening to griefcast. Its comedians (and other notable people) talking about death and grief. I listen occasionally and find it enormously helpful as they quite often express how I feel when i cant always find the words myself.

Id also get to the gp to rule out any physiological (is that the word?) causes for fatigue. See if they can refer to counselling or similar.

Hope you feel better soon

MH professional here. I'm so sorry for your loss. The main thing is that right now, it's normal that you feel this way. Experiencing grief is a really important part of the process you are going through right now. It's totally normal to feel so sad when you have experienced so much loss. It doesn't mean you have mental illness. For now, go with it. Obviously you need to make sure your sons basic needs are met, and that he feels loved and safe, but beyond that, go with the grief. It's likely to slowly get better. If it doesn't, or you feel unable to cope with your emotions. check in with your GP. Much love to you at this tough time

Perfectly understandable, OP, you’ve experienced a major loss. It’s life changing, and grief is not linear. Have you spoken to your GP about accessing some counselling to help you work through it and so you have a space to express your feelings?

There is also www.cruse.org.uk/ - they have a helpline, it could be a good place to start.

Thank you all, I hate feeling like this and have been fortunate not to lose anybody before so to lose both parents close together has really thrown me

I found group counselling provided by our local hospice really helpful. (You didn’t need to have lost someone there.)

@Mymapuddlington I lost both my mum & dad in 2019 , suddenly at the same time, we did not have a close relationship but they were my parents at the end of the day and since then I've needed them often for support and some kind words. Please reach out to me I've have battled through every low imaginable, I am still trying to cope nearly 2 years on. We may be good for each other xx