Helping someone who can’t use smartphones or computers due to MH issues

[MangoSeason]

Just that really. A relative is in his early 40s and his MH paranoia issues are exacerbated by smartphone usage. He has had an iPhone in the past gets very distressed when he receives unsolicited text messages. He also gets distressed when notifications such as system upgrades pop up on his screen. He has decided he will never use smartphones or computers.

He is fine with his old brick mobile and isn’t upset at unsolicited texts received on it, because in his mind that is a wrong number on the phone system, whereas on a smartphone it is sort of like Skynet.

The issue is that his life is becoming very small and difficult because of this. Some examples are-

1. He tried to make a doctor’s appointment over the phone, but got told off by the receptionist for not using their booking app. I guess she thought a person in their early 40s had no excuse not to use it. He now is scared to ring and make appointments in case he gets told off again.
2. He has always loved popular music but most artists no longer release music on CDs, just streaming services. We muddled through for a few years, where he would tell me the songs he wanted and I would download and burn them to CDs and post them to him. But I no longer have a burner and he has just upgraded his car and no longer has a CD player. His great love of music is now limited to the radio.
3. He is a farm labourer ( excellent employee which has so far saved him). The owners have implemented a state of the art computer system which covers irrigation, picking times, fertilisation etc. They want him, not unreasonably, to learn to use the system on an iPad. He just can’t. He gets so worried about messages and being watched.

Not sure what I am really after. He has sought mental health treatment in the past and I believe he is on medication. He has held down a full time job and managed to buy a house and keep stable. I just feel that things are only going to become harder for him in this digital age.

I just don’t know what to do to help. Has anyone had similar that could give me some advice?

Just to add, I live 900km away, so any help I can give won’t be in person.

Can you get a basic mp3 device or ipod for music downloads or transfer onto memory stick and use a smart audio device/speaker?

It's great that he's doing so well and is stable but he really needs to get therapy for this computer issue. 20 years ago it wouldn't have been a problem but nowadays using computers and the Internet is an essential part of life. Maybe he could go private and have CBT or something. I'm suggesting he goes private because he wouldn't need to go on a waiting list or deal with the GP receptionist.

If he's experiencing this level of distress and it's risking his job, he's not getting proper medical treatment.

You say he is taking medication - are you sure? My relative who experiences paranoia and psychosis frequently goes off his, we've been told it's very common because unfortunately anti-psychotics have lots of unpleasant side effects like brain fog and weight gain, so people quietly go off and cruise under the radar if they aren't floridly psychotic.

Even if he is taking medication, he needs to see a psychiatrist again to potentially adjust his dose and hopefully to help him access suitable counselling and support here also. Can you help him organise that? As a farm labourer he presumably isn't that well off, but might there be funds to help him see a specialist privately if needed? The waiting lists are very long.

@LIZS

Can you get a basic mp3 device or ipod for music downloads or transfer onto memory stick and use a smart audio device/speaker?

Actually, the memory stick might work- his new car would have a USB port. Thanks!

Sadly the iPod wouldn’t work. Any small electronic device with screens is problematic. A few years ago, with his permission, I took out the SIM from his old iPhone to kind of turn it into an iPod. I downloaded a lot of his music and it worked well for a while. Unfortunately some of the fruit picker backpackers tried to be helpful and joined him to the farm’s wifi system. He got so overwhelmed and distressed about all the system update messages popping up that his parents had to drive hundreds of kilometres to help him. No-one’s fault at all but something like that would always happen with a smart device. He is adamant he will never use one again.

Not all have touch screens. Such as www.argos.co.uk/product/2141572?clickSR=slp:term:radio%20mp3%20player:16:25:1

@OverTheRubicon

If he's experiencing this level of distress and it's risking his job, he's not getting proper medical treatment.

You say he is taking medication - are you sure? My relative who experiences paranoia and psychosis frequently goes off his, we've been told it's very common because unfortunately anti-psychotics have lots of unpleasant side effects like brain fog and weight gain, so people quietly go off and cruise under the radar if they aren't floridly psychotic.

Even if he is taking medication, he needs to see a psychiatrist again to potentially adjust his dose and hopefully to help him access suitable counselling and support here also. Can you help him organise that? As a farm labourer he presumably isn't that well off, but might there be funds to help him see a specialist privately if needed? The waiting lists are very long.

I totally agree.

Re the medication. I believe he is taking it. He has a high degree of trust in doctors and is usually a very compliant patient. His parents make sure he has scripts. Obviously I can’t guarantee it but that fact that he is stable in most aspects of his life makes me think he is taking it. Prior to getting medication over a decade ago, he was extremely erratic. That said, it is highly likely his dose needs adjusting. As you point out, it is a problem. He works in the Outback and there wouldn’t be a psychiatrist for hundreds of kilometres. He rarely leaves his workplace. Can’t see anyone via Telehealth, because, computers.

Funds aren’t a problem. He lives on the farm rent free, has a property he rents out and his parents would pay for medical treatment at the drop of a hat. Why he isn’t getting proper treatment is due to a mix of lack of access, family complexities and his own belief that everything is fine as long as he doesn’t use computers. To some extent, he is right! There are no guardianship or mental health orders over him so while you can lead a horse to water, etc etc.

[quote LIZS]Not all have touch screens. Such as www.argos.co.uk/product/2141572?clickSR=slp:term:radio%20mp3%20player:16:25:1[/quote]
Now something like that would be good! I see it has a USB port so I could periodically mail him music, just like our old CD system. Thank-you.