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Fed up of feeling used

5 replies

nutcracker · 03/11/2004 09:38

Need to get this off my chest rea;;y.

Basically i am sick to death of people using me, basically being my friend whilst i'm of some use to them and then not wanting to know as soon as i've served my purpose.

I had a friend who i met at Dd1's school as our kids are in the same year. At first we just used to chat at the gates e.t.c, but then when i discovered i was pregnant with Ds we became closer as she was due to have her Ds.
When our kids were nearly one, we both decided to go back to college to do the same course. From then on she was always ringing me to natter about college or coming around to mine so we could do our college work e.t.c. I had a computer and she didn't, so we would sit and do work on it and if she ever needed me to order anything for her i was more than happy to.
After the first term i decided to give up college as i was struggling. She decided to give up, a couple of months later. I always got the impression that she was a bit annoyed with me for giving up as she no longer had anyone to chat to about it.
Anyway, her dd then started ballet with my dd. We would sit for the 45 minutes there were in their lesson, having a good old natter, and i really enjoyed it as it was a chance for me to have a bit of time to myself without the kids.
In the summer holidays she spent virtually every day at mine with her kids, and every day i fed the kids and was left with a tip at the end of the day. At the time i didn't mind this because i considered her to be my friend.
In september she decided to go back to college. I was also going to go back but in the end i wasn't happy with the nursery so i didn't.
My mom decided to sell her computer and i persuaded her to let my friend have it as she needed it for college. My mom did her a huge favour as she sold it to her for a fraction of what it was worth.
Anyway now she just doesn't want to know. I am obviously of no use to her now, she has her own computer so i'm not needed for that (apart from when she gets stuck and rings me for help), she can't talk to me about college and now has another person willing to let her sit in her house and have her kids fed.
She has made friends with another girl at college who i also know. This girl lives not 1 minute from my doorstep and she has also ben to my house for coffee and chats several times. It now seems though that my friend has been to hers on nseveral occasions recently and this girl said to me today "oh i didn't think, you could have come over to'.

I know this all probably seems very childish, but i am really quite anygry and upset. The one friend i had , or thought i had is basically now not interestred unless she wants something.
Oh and she has also pulled her dd out of ballet, upsetting my dd. Her reason being that her dd doesn't like it (which isn't true). More like she can't be bothered to sit and make conversation with me.

OP posts:
color · 03/11/2004 09:47

Nutcracker hope you start feeling better soon. I know what it's like. Too many selfish people out there. Wish I could say something to give you a smile/laugh right now.

tammybear · 03/11/2004 10:05

wish i had something useful to say nutty. just wanted to send hugs. xxx

MINNIE1 · 03/11/2004 10:49

nutcracker, {{{hugs}}}}

I know to well what its like, My bfriend used to do this although it was not as bad as what yours did to you!!! She would ring when she wanted somthing, so i stop being so easy with her... i call her for the chats and she calls for me to do somthing for her..
If she wants to carry on like this let her off as she dos'nt know what she is missing.. Your heart was in the right place each time you helped her out..
Hope you feel better and please don't let her bring you down..

nutcracker · 03/11/2004 14:18

Thanks guys. Have been window shopping to cheer myself up a bit.

It will be hard but i will now try to keep my distance from her otherwise she will carry oin using me and i will get more and more upset about it.

OP posts:
MrsMiaWallace · 04/11/2004 21:50

most of my 'friends' are like that, i used to work in a ffotball stadium and was asked to get cheap shirtsd for their friends, boss's dogs, sisters aunt!!!iyswim!
its horrible isnt it...you really do your best and more than required really and they crap on you! what can you do?

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