DD's counselling

[lanatolater2]

I wasnt sure where to post this. My DD is a school refuser, suffers with depression and anxiety and has in this past month both self harmed, and taken an overdose for which she was hospitalised.

CAMHS are taking forever to give us any kind of support and school is also useless. With this in mind we put her on a waiting list with a local charity specialising in child and adolescent issues and she has just been offered a weekly slot with them for which we are very grateful.

CAMHS have said I need to tell them if/when this was confirmed as then they could take her off their own waiting list for one of their psychologists.

However, on researching her counsellor she is actually a marketing manager and property developer with "dip.couns" and seemingly volunteers sort time at the charity. I'm not entirely sure that the 10 sessions we have with her should really be taking the place of her seeing a psychologist or psychiatrist or similar through CAMHS.

I really hate to sound snobby, and I'm really very grateful for what this charity is offering but should I be pushing for further support... or see what help this lady is first? I'm a total novice at all this.

Just don’t tell CAMHS

MH services will do anything to offload patients, and will grab this opportunity to divest themselves of responsibility for your daughter given half the chance. "Forget" to inform them would be my approach.

Right, that sounds like the best approach then. I'll have her start the counselling because this lady could of course be a godsend for DD and in all likelihood is qualified to help. But I won't let CAMHS know that they can wash their hands of her just yet!

There’s no way I’d tell CAMHS, but for what it’s worth, CAMHS tend to be pretty crap. I’d be doing absolutely everything I could to pay privately for a weekly or even twice a week session with a private counsellor.

Good luck…

Thank you.

I've tried to make the numbers work so I can afford private counselling but I'm off work due to my own health and struggling to make ends meet on UC alone so it's not an option right now.

Definitely don't tell them! If she starts counselling with CAMHS then it would be best to stop the other counselling as it can cause problems seeing 2 people at once and isn't recommended. However CAMHS are pretty useless in my experience and unfortunately you need to fight for whatever support you can get, from wherever you can get it.

I really hope things improve for your DD and for you. It's so very hard to support a child through this.

Firstly, I am so sorry that you and your DD are going through such a tough time.
I am a counsellor and just wanted to reassure you that the counsellor that your DD is seeing at the charity will almost certainly be as qualified, if not more than a private counsellor. A diploma in counselling is the full qualification (at least 2 years of studying as well as all of the practical experience needed to pass the diploma). Many counsellors volunteer at some settings for some of their hours as either a way of giving back or practicing in a particular area.
Unfortunately, counselling is an industry which is not regulated and anyone can set themselves up as a 'private counsellor' - the charity will have ensured that they only use fully qualified counsellors.
By all means, it's important to continue with CAMHS but don't waste money paying for a counsellor when you've been offered free sessions...

@PleaseHoldCaller1 thank you. Yes it's a bloody nightmare!

@HollyHocks13 thank you that's great insight

The exact same thing happened to us, only the charity and CAMHS communicated with each other, and they did indeed remove her from the waiting list for CAMHs. Not only that, but at the CAMHS assessment we were told that if the counselling with the charity didn't help, they could re-refer her back onto the CAMHs waiting list and we wouldn't have to wait so long, which turned out to be a lie.

Unfortunately, the counselling with the charity didn't work out, because DD has ASD, and they weren't trained to support children with ASD and MH difficulties, so they tried to refer her back into CAMHs, but CAMHS refused to accept the re-referral. Not only that, but they refused to tell me or the chairty the reason why they refused it, and when I did a SAR. they "lost" the notes from the MDT meeting where she was discussed.

So unfortunately my faith in CAMHS is less than nothing. And this was pre-pandemic, and I imagine things have got worse since then.

@PretzelParadox I'm so sorry you had to go through that. They're just not fit for purpose are they. Seems their very existence is a box tick

I think they are completely overwhelmed and will do anything to get children off their waiting list. Which sounds horrible doesn't it, but yeeah.

But I hope you have better luck with CAMHs, and your DD feels better soon

@PretzelParadox yes I doubt it's anything to do with the individuals who work their. It's clearly just totally underfunded and overwhelmed

Don’t tell camhs!

Think positive about the counselling, small insights or tools or changes might happen.

You could check on the British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy - google BACP directory to see if the counsellor is registered on there. I would imagine the charity would ensure the counsellor they have is qualified but this is one way to check.

Hi op

Many counsellors have another career outside of their counselling clients
As it doesn't pay enough full time

Dip couns, would be a diploma in counselling which is the least she would need to ethically be able to see clients.

And yes do see if she is on the register with the BACP either as accredited or
Voluntary, which means she has passed their sit down exam to practice.

Okay I've checked the register and she's definitely not on it

She might be UKCP, NCS, or something else — BACP isn't the only register.

I can you find her anywhere, none of the registers, no website, not even LinkedIn.

Still, you could have the most qualified counsellor in the world and not click with them so I'm not going to lose hope. This lady could be great.

I'm definitely feeling like it's not enough though for DD to be taken off the camhs radar for now

Sorry, meant to say I can't find her anywhere