Psychanalysis

[Shehasadiamondinthesky]

I had my first session yesterday on the NHS. I've got 12 sessions at least.
I talked to her about all this awful stuff for 2 hours , the abuse, the sexual assaults etc. Felt nothing really just numb.
Then st the end she asked how much my cat dying had affected me and the floodgates just opened. It was like a tsunami, the end of the world. I cried all the way home and all evening. Not sure how I'm going to cope with 12 sessions of this.
I'm seeing the constant psychiatrist next week to check my medication and go over my diagnosis. We think its complex PTSD but they think there is more than that going on.
It seems I can take about anything other than my lost cats bizarre.

I can totally understand about the cat. My husband died of cancer one of my children was making multiple suicide attempts and my cat stopped eating. When the vet told me she had cancer and had only à few weeks to live I broke down in tears in front of the vet.
I started therapy just after the cat died. I told the therapist quite calmly about childhood trauma, my partner's death and my child's suicide attempts and then started to cry about the cat.
We have talked about why I was so upset about the cat a lot - it didn't surprise her as she saw it as very much linked to other traumas and she thinks I have PTSD.
So don't feel bad about about the cat, although 12 sessions seems to me to be very short for this sort of therapy.

Next time I’d ask her for coping strategies for after you leave and the days after.
Regarding getting so upset over your cat. I was once told it was because it’s accessible grief / trauma that isn’t so hidden etc away. Which to me made perfect sense.
I hope you get on ok with your sessions, 2 hours seems quite long to me.

Thank you Roseau and Blue, that makes perfect sense. Its 12 sessions minimum she said. Its difficult because I work in the NHS and I have to take annual leave everytime I have a session but I'm going to plough on.
Sounds like you are just having an awful time Roseau, how are you both doing now?

Happy to chat privately but don't want to post too much on a public forum. I will just say that other traumas have followed the ones I mentioned and that I have very much needed therapy to remain functional.

I'm so sorry, life is just rubbish for some of us.