here we go again

[gingernutlover]

i am feeling so so alone at the moment

i have always found it hard to make friends but since dd was born now 2 i had made a couple of good friends, or so i thought

1 i have heard today is moving about 10 miles away, which is lovely for her as its near her family and she doesnt have the car much which isdifficult with 2 little ones. But i just know this is the beginnning of the end of our friendship, she hardly ever has the car and so it will be me thqat has to do all the running - which lets face it when you are feeling like crap most the time anyway jst doesnt happen like it should

the other frind lives very close and we are actually moving to house closer to her which seemed lovely at the time but i think lately she is making loads of new friends and never has time for me, i work part time and only have 2 days off weektime whereas she is a sahm. she told me today her dd is starting preschool in january so she wont be going to toddler group with me anymore on that day and she told me very cheerfully how she and another friend have m,ade a poact to go shopping together every week on the same day, which happens to be the same day we normally meet up other than toddler group.

I find it really hard to make friends and maybe i have rlied too much on these friends but with working 3 days a week I just dont have tht much time to make other frineds, i find it extremely hard to be at home on my own with dd - she ios lovely but i really find my days off the hardest time of the week, all by myself, no company and i rarely make the effort to come out of the house.

I know i should try to make other friends so it doesnt matter that these others seems to be drifting apart from me but everyone at groups i go to seems so pally and i just dont know what to say in social situations.

how sad am i feel like the depression is gonna come back again and dh is talkkjing about how he is going to have to start doig weekend work for the forsseeable future and my mum will be off on holidays again with rich boyfirend.

I know i shiouldnt overly rely on people to make me feel better but the thought of losing all thus contact with other poeple makes me feeling so sad, keep crying all the timre

i really dont blame either of these frineds, they are getting on with their lives and makeing changes for the better. I seem to have a permamnent sinking feeling in my stomach, like at school when the netball teams were picked and i was always last

I feel for you gingernut. feeling lonely is horrible. where do you live? are there any mumsnetters you could meet up with locally at all? cuold you join an evening group- badminton or life drawing or anything at all?

thanks for the advice guys

i could offer to take number 1 friend shopping, but where she is moving to is within 5 minute walk of shops and supermarket so wouldnt be a regular thing, but with a bit of effort i am sure i can keep up that friendship - will just be tough not having her 5 mins walk away

with friend number 2 i think i probably should say that i am feeling a bit sad that she will no longer be around on the days we used to meet and see what her rewaction is

at the back of my mind there is a little voice saying they dont want to be be your frineds, why would they want to be your friends .....

as far as evening classes go, i am a member of the gymn and do go acouple of evenings, alternatly to when dh goes. DD is only 2 so one of us has to be there, funnily enough i dont find the evenings that tough, more the day time. I dont really talk to anyone at the gym - not that kind of place.

oh and i did go on one mumsnet meet but to be honest i ended up on the edge of a big circle not saying much and no one really made the effort to speak to me - my fault I am sure, they wewre all lovely ladies if i only had the strength to come out of my shell

oh and little lapin, shoppiong does tae most of the day with this friend - she is likeme a shopaholic

they both know i suffer from depression and one should undertsnad as she too suffers from it, the other is more of a natural mother type, so no pnd there and dont think she really "gets" why i get dep[ressed iykwim

lol

xmas party - where?

I am in kent

i am just too shy to walk into somewhere i dont know people, honest, but its kind of you to suggest it. Would be a case of sitting in corner, not saying much as per bloody usual

thanks for trying to cheer me up

dd is a redhead too, all the best ladies are, mine has uinfortunatly faded to a mousy colour

and its the biscuits i am into really, hair is not so yummy lol

thanks for making me smile, guess i might just have to get used to being on my own A LOT

time of year does not help at all all these dark evenings

okay so was totally ready to confront the friend and tell her she had upset me, but does this rather smack of being a little needy?

there is a way to say something like that without seeming too needy
something along the ines of i really enjoy meeting up on x day and hope we can still manage it sometimes even with your new shopping plans? you could even add i am feeling a bit lonely at the moment and would really value some time with you going forward and am a bit afraid this might not happen (or something am sure you coud think of soemthing better...)