Mental heath getting worse

[mumfromafar]

My mental health seems to be getting worse as the days go on. I have recently moved and feel very isolated and alone. I live in supported housing because I had/have an addiction and there are staff but they aren't trained in mental health. I have bipolar and unstable personality disorder and I just feel so depressed. I'm eating everything in sight (after managing to loose 2 stone), I cry all the time, I miss my children terribly (dad has full custody and I see them in a contact centre twice a month) and I often feel suicidal which everyone has a go at me about, telling me I have too much to live for. I feel like I'm living in limbo, waiting for my life to start. I can't work, I'm far away from family and I feel I am becoming a burden to them. I am also trying to deal with the guilt of my actions during addiction. I feel despair, I feel lost and I don't know how to keep going.

This sounds really difficult. You have a lot to cope with. What does a day to day routine look like for you?

I’m really sorry you’re going through this, I don’t have any experience of addiction but I can understand the feelings you are feeling completely. Hope you’re ok, take each day as it comes and there will be small improvements each day x

I get up and have a couple of cups of tea, then try and get out for a run then that's it for the day. I have applied for some volunteer work in a chartity shop for something to do, I'm hoping I get the opportunity as I'd like to be with others and give back

@mumfromafar has the pandemic made everything so much worse too?

The pandemic hasn't helped but it's more the fact that I screwed up so badly, lost my kids and feel I have no sense of purpose. I have a meeting at a charity shop for some voku terr work so I'm hoping that helps. I just feel sad but agitated at the same time.