Need advice on antidepressants

[babypinkelephant]

So I'm not if they're what I need but I keep on being told I'm depressed.

After having my child two years ago I have not slept properly since. I don't mean waking once or twice but continuously throughout the night no matter what I do or try. My husband can't help (won't go into it and too outing).

She is now going through medical tests to see why she's not sleeping but it's not helping me. She's on sleeping medication which is just a making things worse.

I've put on 3 st since having her because I'm in survival mode of reaching or sugar and catching sleep where I can.

My husband says I'm a different person now, I'm always exhausted, I'm low in mood, I find everything a challenge and difficult.

My worry is I have heard some medication you can't breastfeed on, they make you put on weight, they can make your mental health worse.

I need something to lift my mood so I can face the day and be happier and healthier for my family. I try and put in a brave face for my daughter but I'm not sure it's working any more.

Could someone advise me on what course I should be going towards. Doctors just want to stick you on a generic medication and never listen.

Oh and I lost my mum at the start of the year and have no family to help with my daughter.

Life is tough

@ArseInTheCoOpWindow

Could you wean her off the boob and co sleep with her?

Or sleep on a mattress in her room.

She is night weaned, she doesn't ask for it at night and only has it three times in the day.

I have taken to sleeping on a blow up On her floor but it's evident that even that isn't helping, she's waking up crying for me even before she looks to see if I'm there and once she knows I'm there she's checking as she's falling asleep to make sure I'm there. I've never sneaked out until she's fully asleep.

It's so hard to see her with bags under her eyes, having these absence seizures and seeing the effect it's having on her mood and behaviour :(

@TreesAndStuff

And I imagine you are a different person but don't let that burden you, you are dealing with huge challenges plus losing your mum am so sorry for you loss

You mustn't feel guilty for the change in you, it's the circumstances - EVERYONE would be the same. You have to think of yourself first.

Thank you, I've come to two conclusions

1. There is something wrong with her to make her like this

1. I've royally fucked up somewhere when she was born with her sleep to make her like this

She sounds like she has really bad separation anxiety.

What happens if she comes in your bed?

This sounds like an over anxious child who’s too scared to sleep? Is that what it is?

She has been very clingy lately but this situation has been the same since birth. Absolutely no joke. She has never slept properly and she has been diagnosed with epilepsy but it's just absences seizures (still not great) but we don't know if that's what been causing her bad sleep or if it's just an effect of bad sleep.

I hate co sleeping with a passion. I will stay on a blow up in her room with her but I can't stand her in my bed. It puts me on edge

Just to update I went to the drs today and I start on medication tomorrow as I've reached the end of the line but it feels like a positive step

Sorry NC but I am the OP

Good for you OP hope it improves things for you.
How do you name change?

Yes, how are you? How's the situation?

I've name changed too, you do it under 'my Mumsnet' in the app.