I have also posted this on alcohol support but as it’s mental health but with alcohol as a secondary issue caused by my mental health thought would post here too
I know it’s not normal and I have a history of alcohol abuse I have managed to curtail this from drinking 3 bottles of wine/bottle of vodka a day to just drinking a few on the weekend it was hard but I did it with support from alcohol support services.
What started that patten and reliance was reporting my abuser (csa) to the police and going through a court case it was my way of self medicating and coping.
I have been in therapy with my psychologist for 14 months and we started EMDR in January revisiting and processing the trauma I have been doing okay with this a few wobbles but 2 weeks ago I had a horrific dream I was being abused and I was enjoying it and since then I have really struggled I have been avoiding sleep in case it happens again I have gone back to self harm something I haven’t done for over a year and in a intimate place not good but the worst thing is I have started drinking to numb/block the dream and the memories I feel like I’m back at square one realistically I know I’m.l not I’m not in denial and also am reaching out to my mental health team so they know everything.
I need some reassurance that I can stop this before it becomes too engrained and a habit ...
I’m scared of being sectioned again especially with Covid times and no visitors and them taking away phone chargers I need to put a stop the drinking and get something in place for the mental health