Our adult daughter is back living at home since graduating last summer. She works full time.
She has had symptoms of anxiety since her teens, but she refuses point blank to see a doctor. She gets hysterical about some things, particularly around tidiness, cleaning and any odours in the house. She mentioned that her house mates at uni thought she was a bit obsessive with cleaning. But now it's becoming intolerable at home. I think our house is clean and tidy. Could be better, but the bathrooms are wiped down every day, the kitchen is clean and tidy, floors mopped at least twice a week, vacuumed regularly. According to our daughter the house and everything in it is filthy. It smells bad everywhere according to her (she constantly uses air freshener), and we are disgusting for living like this. It's caused so many rows. I have anxiety and depression myself, and I've been back to the doctors because it's got so bad. I've been so worried that I've asked friends to tell me honestly if they think our house is dirty, and they genuinely don't know what I mean - they say the house is fine.
Our daughter will go on frantic cleaning sprees, scrubbing tiles, walls, floors and disinfecting the bathrooms. She is visibly angry and stressed when she does this. She will tidy things away when you're still using them. She's also thrown things out (paperwork) that she considers to be rubbish.
It's got to the point that living with her like this is intolerable. But she says we're disgusting for living in a "fucking shithole". I'm worried about her, as I can't force her to see a doctor, she's 23, an adult. I also don't want her to feel unwelcome in her home. I really don't know what to do. It's like she sees dirt where it isn't there. I've upped my cleaning schedule in an attempt to make it acceptable in her eyes, but it never is.