Please help me with my DP

[Bedsheets4knickers]

We had a horrendous time of it from July last year till now really . We were in our rented home for 11 years and had spent from Nov 2019- June 2020 doing home improvements as we thought we were there to stay for along time to come . The house sadly went on the market and we've had to move . This hurt us both very badly and in the first few weeks after finding out we had some awful rows . Alcohol fulled and terrible things were said . Mostly from me as I had wanted to control our spending for the best part of 20 years and get on the property market . He earns a very good wage compared to mine . I just could never get him to knuckle down and save . It's left a lot of resentment.
We moved in January and not far from where we lived so I feel very fortunate us and our kids have not lost friends and our village . We are on a savings plan now and hoping to buy next year .
My DP can not shake what's happened to us and is sinking into a dark place . He won't talk . He's very down . He wfh then has to have a sleep after he's logged off . He's never been like this . I'm getting more more worried about what we said to each other on the days after we found out we were losing our home . I know he's a proud man and he's embarrassed about what has happened .
How do I help him when he won't talk .
He's just not the man I know . I'm really starting to think that maybe to much was said and theirs no coming back from it .

Hi @Bedsheets4knickers what a horrible time it sounds like you are having. Although he won't talk it does sound like you have to find a way to clear the air and open up to have a heart to heart. Could you find a way to plan some time together with out the kids to talk it through. Talk about how you are feeling and also voice your concerns about him. Does he have any close friends he could speak to or go for a walk with? If he opens up and is feeling low it could be worth him speaking to his gp about how he's feeling. Good luck op xx

Thanks for your reply . I don't think he will talk to a GP and he has no friends near by . He has work friends but he hasn't seen them since March last year .
He will not entertain any conversation about buying a house and has a rabbit caught in head lights look about him when I tell him how much I'm saving and where I think We'l be in a years time . I feel like he has more debt than he's letting on , almost like he's to scared to tell me .
It's come to a point that we have an awkwardness between us . He functions gets up and washed , works and does bits around the house . He loves his kids dearly but he's just not himself . His mother is very much like this . I feel like I'm living with his mother if that makes sense .