Need to ring crisis team, but can't

[Scoobygang7]

On max dose of antidepressant and I am back in the cycle of it failing again. Phone call with gp who due to the fact I always get better or manageable symptoms of my depression for 6-12 months then they appear to slowly stop helping. They don't know what to do, I need the crisis team to pathway me back to pych services. Who always fob me off eventually because of the cycle of works then doesn't. I have intrusive suicide thoughts, get as far as planning but knowing I won't follow through apparently means I am fine to be fobbed off.

Just because I can't follow through doesn't mean I am not suffering. I don't know how to gather myself to call. Especially as my dp is at work and I need to be here to look after my 2 children.

I can't offer much advice but didn't want to read and run. How old are your children? Could you sit them down with a snack and something to watch while you make the phonecall you need to?

How old are you children op?
You can it, it will be such a weight off your shoulders once you have but take things a minute at a time.
Are your children at napping age, could you do it then?

Should say can do it

Kids are nearly 3 and 6. I just can't face being fobbed off again.

Rang waiting for call back from an rmn

Do you find the crisis team helpful? I've been recommended to ring them a few times but don't think they'd do anything.

@Someone1987

Do you find the crisis team helpful? I've been recommended to ring them a few times but don't think they'd do anything.

@Someone1987 yes they can be. I depends what you're looking for I guess. Had a chat about what's going on and we decided I can hang fire and wait for the school and nursery to take my boys in. I just needed I think someone to reframe my thinking and eventually down the line learn to like and treat myself better. Hope you're doing OK at the moment

Hope you're feeling better today OP. Did you call?

Tell them you don't want to be fobbed off as you recognise that your suicidal ideation can quickly become reality without help. Fingers crossed x

I did call, he helped me frame how I am viewing things better. Just holding out for school and nursery to return so that I can get some me time. He did state that I could take places for the boys but I explained we'd tried this and school weren't shifting on refusal to take them. Even though my dp is a key worker because I am a sahm. So just need to drag myself through the next 2 weeks.