Wish I'd never talked to GP

[Kayem00]

Had depression and anxiety for years. Mostly can cope, but sometimes I really struggle. I've always avoided GP but have just felt really bad and weepy all week so asked for appointment. Immediately he was short with me when I said what was wrong because I wasn't doing it right and describing symptoms and that just set me off crying for the rest of it and rambling that he wasn't being very patient. I didn't feel like I could talk to him at all after that but I tried to be more specific but there's a lot wrong and I found it hard even though I'd written a list. I guess I was jumping between different things and still wasn't being specific enough, like about what talking treatment I had 10 or 15 yrs ago for 2 minutes. Felt like he gave up on me at the end and just told me to go to IAPT site and complete a test and then refer myself. I didn't understand what he meant so rang them and cried again while they did it for me.
It's just debasing to go through that and get nothing out of it. I thought they had questionaires and stuff and would assess me. Even if I couldn't have proper SSRIs, propanolol would have helped me with some anxiety inducing triggers that make me so much worse but didn't even talk about medication with me. Feel stupid tonight and I'm returning to my baseline of just about functional but miserable and avoidant now so I guess I'm ok. Since I've been getting through it on my own for years I guess I don't feel 'bad' enough to deserve help mostly anyway so probably won't follow through with IAPT (whatever thats supposed to be) now. Anyway sorry, just needed to vent somewhere

I felt exactly same other day .. felt like waste of time

I have been really interested in nutrition recently and struck by the link between this and depression as apparently patients fared better with micronutrients like fish oils, magnesium and probiotics (I think) for anxiety and depression and i know it’s far better to persevere with the right doctor but just thought I’d mention it as I found lots of videos on you tube and wished more people knew.
I have anxiety myself and finding changing to decaf coffee and taking magnesium seems to help as it’s much improved.

I hope someone can give advice though as it may be better trying another GP or asking for one ib particular you’ve related to in the past ?

Ps don’t feel stupid about it, it sounds like not your fault at all! And sorry it wasn’t a helpful experience, don’t be disheartened as you did a good thing going and don’t give up

Can't believe he was so awful, OP. I'm sorry that happened. First time I tried to get help my GP at the time said I was just upset and it was normal and would pass.

I am so sorry your GP has not taken on board why you spoke to him.
It is not your fault if you haven't explained yourself properly, or said too much about the past, you are not a diagnostician (?)
Is there another GP in the practice that you can speak to? Yes, you can self-refer in some boroughs/counties. But, clearly you need a bit of help and reassurance now, and that will take time.
I would make another appt. , if you can't get anyone else, speak to him again.

Be slightly more specific, about how you feel now, and what you want from him - meds, a referral, or signposting to other people who might be able to help you.
There a lots of sites on line. I think Mumsnet has a section, which might be more helpful, and you'll have more peer support. But, more to the point, remember Samaritans do listen, there is also CALM ( C against living miserably).
These are really hard times, don't be too hard on yourself, you are doing your best. Look you not only reached out to your GP, you rang them back & asked for help; and you reached out on here.
Take care of yourself

Your GP sounds unhelpful and unkind. I always find it hard to get my point across at medical appointments and often cry. It's embarrassing and makes you feel worse. Is there a more sympathetic GP you can see/talk to at your surgery?

I was the same at the appointment. It took me a lot to come and talk to somebody and of course I started crying straight away. It’s so difficult and often you need to built trust first. I would go back and ask to see some one else.
By the way, I was referred to IAPT as well. It was the course called Silver cloud which involved reading some materials and answering questions but the problem was that no one else supported me or somehow responded to it so it didn’t help me at all. Officially I had a supporter who sent me 2 or 3 times a generic message saying basically it’s great that you moved so far ( in reading), carry on. But maybe I was just unlucky.
Tbh I started reading MN and it helped me much more.

I will try again at some point I guess just to try and get some beta blockers for the things that are likely to trigger my extreme physical anxiety (thankfully this is fairly infrequent) because I don't think I can stay at my job without them. The rest of my problems just feel too complex and longstanding for the bit of help offered by the NHS to be useful. I'm worried starting something very short term or self led with little additional support will just make me worse. I guess I will look into paying for private therapy. It's really quite sad and striking that you can have someone on the phone sobbing about struggling for years with mental health and almost begging for help and just do absolutely nothing for them. Researching it more it seems there's IAPT for mild/moderate but usually short term depression and anxiety and nothing for more long term or complex needs unless you get suicidal. I remember a family member with similar issues years ago getting to see an actual psychiatrist, a psychologist and a counsellor at different times fairly easily, now it seems you just get a few weeks of cbt after a waiting period and some medication if the GP (who is not an expert in mental health needs at all) decides to prescribe some. It's sad and yeah I'll only go back to specifically request medication after that.

IAPT is better than it sounds and definitely worth pursuing. If you’ve had beta blockers before and they worked can you ask specifically for them again? I’m so sorry about your GP’s response, it’s hardly an unusual scenario is it- long term anxious patient is tearful and confused . And it’s his job! The consultation was rubbish because of him, not you.

Get an appointment with a different doctor. I find they are very different when I call to discuss how my anti depressants are working. Some talk for ages and are very kind and sympathetic. Some seem in a rush and more formal about it all. Try someone else.

This is pretty much what happened to my DP when he rang regarding depression a few months ago. The GP listened to him and then just gave him the numbers for the Samaritans, Mind and IAPT and said to try ringing them. He came away from the call so fragile and upset. Sorry this happened to you OP

For what it’s worth, he rang back the next day and said he’d been thinking about the phone call and was wondering why antidepressants hadn’t been mentioned as he felt they could really work for him. GP said he should’ve asked about them in the call but did him a prescription for them there and then. And he has made so much positive progress since then!

You can buy propanol online with a "private prescription":

www.mypharmacy.co.uk/area/anxiety/?gclid=EAIaIQobChMIw8Xp27z17gIVA7TtCh0YGQeCEAAYAyAAEgIt8fD_BwE

So sorry about your gps response-that sounds awful: I haven't managed to build up the courage to go to the gp so can't imagine building the courage then getting that response.

I recently self referred to IAPT and they were great- but might depend on your area? For me, someone phoned me next day to talk over everything on the phone and whether that service could treat me or whether I should be referred somewhere else, but they were kind and patient.

I started a 6 week CBT course via zoom within a fortnight (although I had a trainee practitioner hence the short wait) but I had no issues with that. I've finished the course now and am still pretty weepy and stressy, but better able to get myself back on track, so for me has been really worthwhile.

I'm sure people will have mixed experiences with IAPT but hope that helps!

Just to say my local iapt starts with cbt but also has emdr, individual therapies and stuff like thereputic groups and specialists ocd support

I got offered far more psychological input by them then the cmht, as the thresholds were so much higher in cmht, it was always focused on risk management and it was focused on much fewer sessions (I got offered 4) of more intense therapies

Just to say my local iapt starts with cbt but also has emdr, individual therapies and stuff like thereputic groups and specialists ocd support

I got offered far more psychological input by them then the cmht, as the thresholds were so much higher in cmht, it was always focused on risk management and it was focused on much fewer sessions (I got offered 4) of more intense therapies

It sounds like a horrible experience, but don’t write off IAPT yet, counselling even for a brief period could be useful.

Oh and I cried loads during my phone call with IAPT and during the CBT itself- they were all very supportive. Don't take it on board from you GP. It's a totally normal response.

Give IAPT a try. Yes you might get offered silvercloud online treatment but if you push back and say you don't want that or tried it before or you really need to speak to someone then you will be offered something else. That's how it works in my service anyway. Or try the online treatment first and then tell them you need more support. IAPT works on the basis of stepped care so they will try the most minimal intervention first.

Does anyone knoes if mental health practitioners useful? I see now my surgery has one of those who do appointments but I don't know if they do anything a GP wouldn't really.

It sounds like GPs are trying to cut down on SSRI use. MH stats are awful which makes me think there's a push from above to massage the figures but cutting prescription numbers.

What do you need from a mh practitioner that your gp didn’t give you?

And I'll give IAPT a try but honestly it makes me way more anxious than the idea of finding a private therapist. Don't know why.

@monsterjam Dunno. Someone who can talk to me about possible medication options either now or in the future without making me feel like shit or fobbing me off?

In that case you might need to check they are qualified to do so, trying to avoid you having what feels like another unhelpful appointment x