Constantly needing something to do

[wombatsandaplant]

Does anyone constantly need something to focus on.

Like recently I have been fighting with esa to get that sorted and now it’s all sorted I feel completely lost and depressed and not sure what to do with myself. This happens whenever I have something to focus on. I don’t know why. I am autistic and have a severe and enduring mental illness. Is it something in common with that. Or am I just a weirdo, that can’t do nothing.

I’m unable to work and don’t have anything right now to focus on so I feel very very low. When I have something to focus on I get very obsessive about it.

Does anyone else experience this?

My mum needs constant stimulation. She has to be going somewhere or doing something. She can't relax. I'm the opposite, too much on and I get stressed and overwhelmed.

Can you have a back up project lined up? Something that distracts you enough to keep you busy, but doesn't stop you doing what you need to do? Jigsaws, colouring, knitting?

I don't have personal experience of autism but I don't its uncommon for ppl suffering mental illness to need to keep busy.

Have you tried a new hobby? Maybe genealogy or knitting?

You'd certainly be able to get stuck into family tree stuff, while something crafty like knitting would give you something to focus on while giving your brain a rest.

I can’t cope with hobbies, it always has to be something that fixed and won’t change. Hobbies I have no motivation for at all. I have to no motivation apart these fixed things.

How do you decide what to focus on? I assume you do essential self care stuff- you shop and eat, and do some washing/cleaning.
What next? Could you set up a book swap scheme, or organise a litter pick?
What counts as being fixed?

I have no advice, but just wanted to say I completely understand because I am the exact same. It's not just you! (also autistic, and ADHD) I go into full-on depression very, very quickly if there's not a project of some kind - a real one that comes from external factors, not one I've created - to focus on. And obsess over!

I'm really sorry you're unable to work. For me, work is usually the source of such projects; it's so hard (for me, anyway) to find something outside of it that's meaningful enough to focus on. So I am not surprised you feel as you do right now.

I really hope you are able to find something soon :-(

I think it’s quite common whether you are autistic or have MH struggles or not - it’s why people become workaholics or fitness obsessives - it drowns out fear and pain.

Nothing wrong with goals in moderation mind you, gives you helpful structure and action begets action etc - could it be fitness or getting the house sorted or starting a home business?

@wombatsandaplant

I can’t cope with hobbies, it always has to be something that fixed and won’t change. Hobbies I have no motivation for at all. I have to no motivation apart these fixed things.

Would that rule out something like family tree research?

Would a volunteering role help, if your health allows? You may be able to do something based from home - especially now.

Sorry, you might not be looking for suggestions but I don't think you're weird at all!