Help - covid intrusive thoughts, trigger warning

[MummyNope]

N/c as I'm not feeling my usual self and don't want this linked to my normal account.

DSS8, DD2, myself and DP all have covid.

I have always struggled with intrusive thoughts, but knowing the children have it has sent me into a tailspin and I don't know where to turn.

I can't describe the turmoil I am currently feeling. I am crying all of the time which is very unlike me. I keep thinking whenever my baby goes down for a nap or down for the night that she won't wake up. I can't stop wondering if she's in some kind of horrible pain I don't know about.

DP and I are so unwell and it feels never ending. We've been inside for 2 weeks now. We all look like crap and I feel I'm down a hole I don't know how to get out of.

Everything makes me feel sick and nothing brings relief. Sometimes I go and stand in our garden but it is tiny and there is nowhere to sit.

I am grieving the loss of a grandparent in the summer who I did not get it say goodbye to. I am in so much pain.

I don't know where to turn, and any pointing in the right direction would be greatly received 🙏

How are you feeling @MummyNope.

I'm feeling similar, I'm waiting for test results for myself which has set something off, I can't describe but like you I can't stop crying , pacing up and down. It's an awful feeling.

@BubblingAlong sorry to hear you're feeling rough too - what are your symptoms ?

I found a podcast last night that actually helped a lot, it's Anna Mathur on Get Your Glow Back - she talks about intrusive thoughts being stories and it made me feel a bit better.

My daughter has turned a corner today and is so much better which has helped too.

This thing is awful though and has completely zapped me of all of my reserves

Contact your GP about the intrusive thoughts, there are online resources that might help you get through this crisis.
Your fears are entirely understandable. It's a very scary time for you.

I've never felt like this before, it's like a funny feeling I can't describe, really anxious. I'm scared of anything happening to me and my children having not mum. I have long covid and I'm really worried.
Glad your daughter is feeling better x

Bubblingalong
The pacing and crying sounds like anxiety to me. Have you tried any grounding techniques? Look up 3-3-3 for a nice simple one. See if it helps at all.

@Beamur I definitely think it's anxiety, I've always had it but never this severe. Thank you for that I will try it x