I'm quite a few months into a relationship. I posted yesterday but thought perhaps posting on here would help.
He has mental health problems. He's lovely most of the time but since Saturday hes a mess. Although alot better today. He's just not himself. This is the second time he's done this and it usually lasts a few days. He was extremely sleepy at the weekend from a medication that causes drowsiness. So he slept for 24 hours. He was quite difficult Monday and yesterday. Infact yesterday I was struggling with it because he's telling me how much he hates messaging and his phone at the moment but still telling me to message and getting grumpy if I say I'll give him space.
I called him yesterday and the conversation was not normal for us. He was defensive. Said some cold grumpy comments that he'd not normally say and I felt like I didn't recognise him when I got off the phone. I almost typed out a suggestion that it wasn't working. But he text me to say he loved me half way through me typing.
Last night he sent a couple of random messages. I was out walking with a friend and he told me all the ways I help him. He also contacted me this morning on his way to work to say good morning.
We met tonight for a walk. He was talking about his feelings abit but was feeling alot happier. He sounded happier but I could see that it was a mixture of improvement and still not quite there. He started saying things that bugged me.
For example he said he doesn't enjoy having a cup of tea with someone. He said If I offered him to come have a cup of tea at mine for example he'd be thinking can I leave now. Then I commented on that and he said I didn't mean you just people in general. He said he feels awkward at other peoples houses and he often hopes people won't want a drink if they call in to see him. He's glad when they go.
I said perhaps you just like your own company and right now you don't want anything else. He agreed he needed to think of himself. He also complained often people just chat to make small talk and that bugs him too.
So I sincerely said look... Im happy to just be your friend. We don't need to be carrying this on if you don't feel ready for more right now. He disagreed and said what exactly does love mean to you. Because I love you to bits and you know I want this to become more over time. He said there are millions of women out there but it was me that came into his life and he fell in love with.
I'm just struggling to get my head around his mental health right now. I want to support him as I know it's a small blip. But he's saying things that make him sound horrible and not very nice attitude wise towards us.
I'm overthinking things tonight. The normal him which I get 99% of the time is funny, romantic, kind, interesting, generous. He loves me to pieces. As I do him. But I don't recognise him at the moment and his strong harsh comments are abit much.
Anyone got any good advice? Thank you. I can explain things further if you have questions. I didn't want to make the post too long.