From the age of 16 -21 I was in a severely abusive relationship that led to an eating disorder, breakdown and eventual hospitalisation.
Then followed a period of turbulence during which I drank too much, slept around and basically tried to scrape back the wild teenage years i felt i missed out on. Hence followed hospitalisation.
I started on Epilim but stopped when I became pregnant ( single mum obviously).
My reputation suffered terribly as a result.
You might think this dosnt matter but to a yound lady trying to carce a niche, it does.
I am now r0 and have the best dp in the world but I ferl inadequate. Lockdown hascaused me to reglect on my mh.
I did have EDMR therapy which literally saved me and i met dp after that...it cleared blockages.
I cannot help feeling ashamed of the mess I was ( and still am sometimes).
This morning i got smoothie all over the kitchen as forgot to hold the jug...then the switch tripped.
Back to feeling crazy and wondering what dp sees in me.
Mum was bipolar btw so i may have that...