Adult ADHD - no one to fill in childhood questionnaire

[justaftb]

I have an appointment for an ADHD / ADD assessment with a psychiatrist. I have to fill in a number of forms before the appointment. There are 2 questionnaires that they ask are filled in by someone who knew me in childhood and someone who knows me now. They can be the same person.

My parents are elderly and confused and I am not close to them and don't want to discuss this with them. And I am not close with my siblings. I am single currently and have always been mostly single. I am quite private and have always hidden the chaotic parts of my life from friends. I think my friends would be surprised and puzzled that I struggle as from the outside it looks like I am doing OK-ish.

Besides just not having anyone to ask, I also feel that this is an invasion of privacy.

Has anyone been through this and not been able to supply these questionnaires? I am afraid the psychiatrist will refuse to see me if I can't supply these.

I forgot to add that not only do they request that these are filled in, they would also speak to whoever fills them in. I hate the idea of such a private thing being discussed.

Who are you having your assessment with? I had no one from childhood so it was based on my questionnaire and one my husband completed. I didn't have school reports either unfortunately but these may help as an alternative

Op, this is the same reason I didn't proceed with an nhs referral for ADHD. My parents and siblings wouldn't have a clue about me

It's a private assessment covered by health insurance I get through work.

I don't have any school reports. Those didn't exist in my primary school as it was a tiny little country school and, looking back, was very informal. And anything from secondary school are long gone. My parents don't hang on to those kind of things.

I can clearly described myself as a child. I've always been quite self-aware.

@wizzywig - Were you able to proceed with a non-NHS psychiatrist?

It's taken me so long to figure out that ADD / ADHD might be what ails me, and from the point of working that out, it's taken me ages to work up the courage to approach GP etc. Now this feels like another barrier.

I'm sure it's still worth continuing. There must be lots of cases where people don't have anyone who knew them as a child.

The forms I did said they may speak to the people, but that didn't happen

Yes, I'll fill out the forms I can this weekend and compose a clear email about my situation. I understand it could be helpful, but it feels like such an invasion of privacy. And I simply do not have anyone I can ask!

Honestly, I would just fill them in yourself, to the best of your ability, and say that you don't have any family members who are able to help here. The issue is that you're not really 'meant' to develop ADHD as an adult. Personally I think this is bullshit, and there are lots of reasons from increased cognitive load, to more screen time to illness (including depression) and perimenopause why someone might find themselves manifesting ADHD for the first time in a significant way as an adult. But if you want to get the diagnosis more easily you need to say that you had some of these symptoms as a child.

PS, if it's a non-NHS psychiatrist they will probably be pretty happy to give you a trial of a medication. That's the trial. I have had a diagnosis of ADHD but the medications don't really help me significantly (as well as being very difficult to get on the NHS and very expensive month by month privately) so after a short experiment I don't take them. But I know people for whom the difference is night and day.

I had an assessment on the NHS and no one I knew had to fill in a questionnaire. Is that standard practice?

Can I ask how you got your assessment op? I think I need to look into this - but hesitant to bother gps at the moment.

I had my assessment (NHS) on Friday and have been diagnosed. My psychiatrist asked me a few questions about my childhood, but I honestly couldn't remember most of it. Maybe a couple of things, but not much. My mum died 5 years ago, I don't have any siblings and I don't really speak to my dad, so that wasn't really an option

It wasn't a big deal in the scheme of things as I was still diagnosed. So I wouldn't worry too much about it

@Pootles34 - I got a referral through my GP. My GP is only doing phone appointments. I explained how I was feeling and that I was going to go private and would she write a referral, which she did.

@BippityBoppity87 - thanks for the info. I remember my childhood and how I behaved quite vividly. Hop efully psychiatrist will be happy with that. What are the next stages for you?

Thank you, I maybe need to just get On with it and see what they say.

Good luck with your assessment.

@justaftb My assessment lasted about an hour and half and I was diagnosed there and then. I'd had 2 mini assessments before that though. And was offered Concerta XL 18mg and picked up my prescription the same day

It was also face to face, which helped massively as I'm terrible on the phone 😅 never know when to talk and the other person is like "helloooo..." oh am I supposed to talk now? Sorry! Or I'll be interrupting, which I find is a lot worse over the phone too