It's my birthday and I'm alone

[mumfromafar]

It's my birthday, I'm alone miles away from my family and children and I feel miserable. I have been through alot this year, I am a recovering alcoholic, I lost my kids, I lost my bf as he was an alcoholic too (very recently), he was lying to me about drinking and I caught him messaging other women and I'm living in a dry house where everyone just stays in their rooms and I seem to just cry all day and wait for the day to end. I am doing CA, I have some mental health support and a keyworker but I feel I am getting nowhere. I haven't seen my kids since August because of lockdown and I am in one of the worst areas for it so am so worried I won't see them at Xmas. I just feel so alone 😢

I have no advice but I just wanted to say I'm sorry you are having a bad time and happy birthday. Could you possibly treat yourself to something small, like a piece of cake/new book? Try to think of it as the time you started to turn around; you got rid of a horroble ex, you managed to stay sober and you worked really hard to see your kids again x

Happy birthday!

Congratulations on your sobriety x you are a role model to me as I am 7 days tomorrow.

I agree with pp, could you order a takeaway?

Are you allowed to use social media?

I’m sorry, @mumfromafar, that sounds hard. It doesn’t sound like you’re getting nowhere though - staying sober is massive. Although I can imagine that day to day life is feeling grim at the moment. There’s a really friendly alcohol-free thread here if you’d like to join us: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/alcohol_support/4043965-YES-it-is-SO-worth-it-YES-it-gets-easier-and-YES-we-thought-it-was-impossible-as-well-its-not-A-thread-for-those-embracing-an-alcohol-free-existence

Happy birthday! 💐

The early days are so shit because you can’t see the light at the end of the tunnel and you’re still suffering the consequences of the addiction m like losing your children. But there’s so much hope. It’s good to try to calm your mind. Do you have something positive to read? Do you have a way to treat yourself? Chocolate or a nice cup of tea? It will get better!

This might not be the best Birthday but think of all the rest in front of you. Next year is looking sunny as you are taking steps now to ensure a bright future. Well done.
There's nothing we can do about Covid. In that respect we're all in the same boat.
Next year will be different. Look to the future and know that in 365 days you can post on here about how much of a fab Birthday you're having.

Birthdays are real bastards for making you look at your life and see what‘s missing. I hate them for that. But getting sober and getting rid of a toxic relationship are big difficult steps that you’ve taken. Might it help to try to work out your next step? To help you feel less stuck.

Sending you birthday wishes. You are doing so well and are in the right place right now. Keep taking each day at a time. This time next year your birthday will be so much better 💐

I did have some cake and did a meeting which helped somewhat. I know next year will be better and I will have my children back in my life if I continue to stay sober. Thank you for your kind words, at least I can go to bed now and tomorrow's a new day!

@mumfromafar

Hi there, I just wanted to drop by (I don’t usually post) as your comment touched me & I wanted to wish you a Happy Birthday. You’re obviously an amazingly strong woman and your life will all come together as you deserve, keep going, you have so much to look forward to xxx

Congratulations on your sobriety and happy birthday.

I know it all seems crappy at the moment, but just focus on where you want to be this time next year, everything you are doing, all of this hard work is laying the foundations for you to build the rest of your life onto.

You have no idea how much it will mean to your kids to know that you fought your way out of your addiction for them and for yourself, they probably won’t remember much of the bad stuff but they will definitely remember that.

You are amazing.

Happy birthday. I hope things improve for you and congratulations on dropping the alcohol. Stay strong.

Morning , my sister was in a similar position a few years ago . She had become completely isolated from her family .She joined NA and it turned her life around .She put all the work in and slowly the people she loved began returning to her . It wasn't easy , but she says neither was being in active addiction. She's now , in her words , a fully functioning part of society , working a full time job in her chosen field , has a lovely safe home sees her daughters and grandchild regularly and looks after her physical and mental health . She now enjoys her life and her family are incredibly proud of her . Well done on taking that step to get your life back . Your putting the work in to make sure your next birthday will be better .

Happy birthday for yesterday and well done on your sobriety. You are being so strong and you can keep going, for your kids. They will be very proud of you x

I’m so sorry your going through this , it must be so hard but just know your not alone and it will get better for you and it’s good you have some support as sometimes that’s what you need when going through a hard time , maybe just focus on getting yourself to a good place and seeing and spending time with your kids where and when possible , it’s sounds like your making all the right steps into a better direction you just need to keep going , wishing all the best for you OP x

P.s Happy birthday! And hope you were able to enjoy yourself

Belated Happy Birthday Wishes! I hope today has been a bit easier for you xx

Happy birthday!

OP recovering alcoholic here, been sober a fair while now. Stayed in a dry house at one point.

If you're wanting sober company there's a million AA zoom meetings which could end up being the building blocks of a new network of wonderful people in your life.

Feel free to send me a pm

Good luck to you. My son was an alcoholic and I know how difficult it is to abstain. One day at a time, you can do it, you have so much to live for.

Well done OP. You are taking big steps in the right direction. The journey is hard right now but have courage, it will get easier.
Happy Birthday.