Does anyone else feel like they are in an abusive relationship with depression? If my depression was a person I could press charges for the self harm it has made me inflict on myself, the emotional abuse, the destruction of all my relationships and life lines, and all the other wasted potential this awful thing has caused me.
My parents both had it which caused untold damage in my childhood, and then I developed it around age 16. I feel like I’ve been robbed of my life. My chances of an education, my career, my self esteem. It’s taken everything from me. And now I’m nearly 40 and I don’t know who I am without it. I ask for help over and over but really, it’s not a priority for anyone is it? It’s my fault really, I should just cope, that’s what they really think. Throw a few drugs my way, token 6 sessions of CBT and then they’ve done all they can.
The adverts say tell someone, ask for help, well i have and they can’t do anything! Add to the fact my local surgery has used covid as an excuse to restrict services even more than they already did (no appointments for 9 months now) and an increased workload as so many colleagues are furloughed and I’m on my knees.
I won’t do anything because I have a son, but I’m so sad that I’ve been robbed of my life. All my potential, all my hopes and dreams. Am I alone?