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The after effects of micromanaging and work place bullying

2 replies

Darklava09 · 03/10/2020 19:58

If you’ve ever been micromanaged or bullied at work how long have you noticed the after effects that still follow you or impact on you?

Mine started in 2017 when I left my job for more money and went to a council. I never experienced such bullying before and couldn’t believe it... jealousy, bitching, micromanaging. I did a secondment and felt loads better... anyways moved onto another job in 2018 and my boss turned out to be a narcissist.... she literally broke me. Would make up little stories, would constantly say comments about my clothing or my face?? I learnt that she did it to most new staff and the turnover was massive. I had such a supportive OCcupational health department and from learning how to keep her at bay I managed almost 2 years of it.
I got an internal job move and found a really good manager. They bought my confidence back a lot... but after being there for 5months realised I couldn’t manage the work and home demands and home life was suffering a lot. They tried to
Keep me but admitted they couldn’t offer what I wanted for one reason or another. I decided to leave for a promotion into a senior role. Was shocked I got it but was super proud.
I’ve noticed I’ve been in my new job a few months but can notice my anxiety is really bad. My hearts racing, I’m tearful, panicky and feeling like I’ve made a mistake leaving my old job. I think I have imposter syndrome and it doesn’t help that one person seems to be really threatened by me starting there.

Now most people wouldn’t give a shit about just one person... but I can’t seem to stop worrying. I worry about how I act around them, what they are thinking, I’m worried that they are trying to get rid of me and some aspects you can blatantly see they are trying to. I just don’t feel strong enough to deal with it. If this was years ago I’d be different but after many years of bullying it’s made my anxiety soooo bad. How do you all manage your anxiety??

Sorry for the length but interested to hear peoples feedback. Smile

OP posts:
RepeatSwan · 04/10/2020 05:39

Firstly congrats on your promotion!

I'm sorry you experienced bullying. I have had it too, but I saw it as their fault/issue/failing, not mine. I am sorry you have been left feeling bad, when you did nothing wrong.

You must be good at your job if the previous manager wanted to keep you. You got a promotion too.

Could you maybe get some counseling to help you put the past behind you? Or else buy some books about healing after bullying. Flowers

Darklava09 · 04/10/2020 09:48

@RepeatSwan thank you Grin you know something I am good at my job. I always have a job with my old boss they’ve said that and I think the reason why the new place is acting like this is because they are worried.... they know I know my stuff!

I am trying to see it as them. The current one is a real strong nasty piece who I haven’t heard one positive story from anyone on my level or below. Up the top love them though for whatever reason which is why I feel so on edge. I don’t feel I have any allies.

I’ve reached out for counselling so just waiting back.

Any book recommendations?

OP posts:
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