I'm going through an awful lot and I honestly don't know why I'm posting this... I suppose I don't feel like I can talk to anyone I know about all this all the time because it will push them away!!
Im 23 and broke up with my boyfriend of 5 years last month and it was all very sad because it just fizzled out into a friendship. He was my very best friend and we still get on so well so it's devastating. He has moved out of our flat but his stuff is still here until I find a new flatmate, which is proving difficult. But he is really doing his best in helping me out from afar until I find my feet.
But I'm stuck in the flat all by myself, with the pressure of finding a new flatmate and a new car (we shared one). I'm having to get myself up and go to work everyday which is so difficult and taking all my strength, and I'm falling really behind. I've now fallen out with one of my best friends because she said I was making everything about me, and she's having her own issues/drugged up a lot, and she's blocked me on everything.
It just seems like one thing after another at the moment. All of that, then falling behind on work, losing 2 people closest to me, trying to find time to look for a car/housemate. And now I've had to have a covid test so can't see anyone/go to work until I get my result. If it's positive I'll have to self isolate all by myself and that'd be the final straw.
I've never felt so lonely in my life. I have good friends who are there if they need me but no one is particularly reaching out to check on me or whatever. I find it quite hard reaching out to people myself and feel annoying. I'm also really sensitive at the moment and overthinking everything as I have so much time to myself.
I don't really know what to do with myself and feel like nothing will ever get better ☹️