Anyone have experience of an adult child with ADD symptoms?

[Josie1968]

Hello there

Does anyone have any experience of their adult child having Attention Deficit Disorder..? My 22 year old son has struggled for so long and recently someone asked whether he might have adhd. I said I didn't think so as he's not exactly hyperactive but she said not everyone is.. when I looked into it he ticks so many of the 'inattentive' criteria!! He's 22 years old and since age 17 he's been on and off various anti depressants and medication for anxiety which have actually made him feel worse!! He was diagnosed at 17 with dyslexia - not really so much reading, writing or spelling but more around memory, concentration, information processing, slow speed of reading / writing etc. His self esteem is very low, he struggles in social situations / speaking with people, cannot organise himself at all and is so forgetful! Also has a real difficulty with motivation. Not 100% certain how another diagnosis would benefit him though, he was really angry when he was diagnosed with dyslexia, when I thought he would be relieved as it explained so many of the problems he'd had throughout school.

Any advice / thoughts would be appreciated. Thank you.

I'm an adult with adhd. The hyperactive element actually relates more to how the brain works per se, rather than someone bouncing around. But it can also manifest in that way. Is he quite a dreamer, often in his own world? My ex is add, so hyperactivity. He's a bit quiet, but very unique and creative, lacks motivation, I'd innatentive. Medication helped me.

@SeasideMaiden thank you. Yes at school he would often ‘drift off’ gazing out the window etc. He’s very musical, he plays drums and guitar and is in a band, yet dreads every band practice and gig because he struggles socially-worried he’s going to say the wrong thing and that people will think he’s stupid etc. because his words / sentences can come out all wrong / get muddled! He says he can’t hear what people are saying to him either which is strange, I’m not sure why that is. He has had a hearing test which showed nothing wrong.
Josie x

Dyslexia and Dyspraxia often go hand in hand. It runs strongly through my family. Have you read up on Dyspraxia? Not sure if I am spelling it right!! Haha!

@Ukholidaysaregreat I’ve looked at dyspraxia before but he has no issues with balance or coordination etc, everything in that way is fine.. he’s always been really good at sports and you need good coordination to be a drummer too, so unsure if he would have dyspraxia. But he does struggle with the organisational and social elements.

My dd is waiting for an ADHD assessment and I think I also have it after reading so much about it regarding dd. The hearing thing sounds like dd and me. I hear that people are speaking and I know the vocabulary, but sometimes I just can't process verbal stuff quickly or accurately enough. It's hard to explain - it just washes over me and then I feel really stupid for not hearing something very straightforward. I've been reading a lot of stuff on this website - ADDitude magazine Maybe your son could have a look and see if it rings any bells. One thing I've read is that in 80% of cases medication is helpful, so maybe the fact that it can be medicated might encourage your ds to get assessed.

I'm an adult with Asperger's and ADD. I "zone out" without meaning to and despite trying to force concentration. I struggle socially, it's like other people know what to say while I'm at a total loss. I sometimes force myself to say something and it comes out with the wrong wording so I end up accidentally saying something offensive or weird. Like my brain juggles the words around instead of stringing then together in a proper sentence before they exit my mouth. This makes me anxious in social settings, and the zoning out from ADD doesn't help either. I find eye contact anxiety-provoking.

I have hyperlexia rather than dyslexia. I could read early, but I struggled with comprehension questions in school. When I read a sentence, either itlookslikethis, or i t l o o k s l i k e t h i s. My brain doesn't string the sentence together into a piece of information, it just sees separate individual words or a mashup of letters, and I have to read it a dozen times before I can take in the actual information. It's very tiring.

I too am a musician. It's something I can absorb my mind with and work hard at and not worry about other things for a while. I now teach it for a living and I can just skip past the chitchat and get on with the job. Being self-employed means I can limit how many students I take on too.

I have found that magnesium supplements improved my aADD a bit but I'm not a doctor so it's best to ask a medic if there's any risk from taking supplements depending on what else he may be on.

I've managed to get a job in music, and a husband, so I'm lucky. Friends... Not so much. I can get along with people but struggle to get past the already difficult smalltalk stage. We'll see what the future holds.

Hi Josie,
This sounds like my daughter! I have just sent you a PM.
Thanks

I have a daughter in her 20 with ADHD inattentive + dyscalculia, an extremely bad working memory, the usual high scores and AS traits. She was diagnosed at 8 and struggled her way to university because '"I accept to be beaten by everybody else but not by my brain" - her live is stressfull, filled with anxiety and everything is way harder than it is for NT people. She is in her 3rd semester and trying to access adult help, but due to C most things are closed.
She's doing sports, taking Omega 3, sleeps enough, drinks water , eats well. But it is not enough.
And like most people with ADHD she has learned that it gives her an almost unlimited capacity to annoy and disappoint people. Every interaction is stressful.

Hi Josie, my 22 yo dd thinks she has ADHD. After reading a variety of articles I think she may be right. This makes me feel so bad for not identifying it when she was younger. She has really struggled mentally the last few years. Now I just want her to get the help she needs. I suppose first it's getting a diagnosis. How long is that likely to take on the NHS?