used to be a reasonably confident driver. menopause & being driven into at a roundabout junction have totoally detsroyed my cinfidence. i can drive about 3 or 4 easy routes, none longer than about 3 miles. the thought of driving anywhere else sends me into a blind panic, so much so that i cant do it. i have tried going out early in the morning.....i stress so much that i cant sleep they night before. if i drive anywhere i cant enjoy it because i panic about the drive home. every single drive i panic about what i might face because each journey presents different vehicles. i feel such a dreadful failure, my self confidence is rock bottom that i cant do something that i see teenagers do & people much much older than me.
ihave been out for a refresher lesson with a driving instructor post covid & hated it, again up all night beforehand. i watch driving videos on yotube, but when it comes to it i cant react & think fast enough. i am beyond terrified at the idea of causing an accident. i know the other driving htreads say just go and do it but that scares me senslesss.
i am crying typing this. my husband is having to take child to a friends house today because i cant do it. in the scheme of things i am very lucky, 2 safe jobs, 2 kids. but i am so useless. i feel guilty about my husband always doing the driving (going out with him would be a recipe for disaster...... he is quite aggressive in his driving stile i think) how can i be a middle aged woman who is just so crap. how can anyone love & respect a woman like me.
i dont know what i expect from typing this post. no one in real life knows how rubbish i am. i just dont see the point of me when i am so useless.