Do I need to seek help?

[user526282]

Hi I'm having a pretty rough 2020, had an operation in Feb, diagnosed with cancer in March, lockdown, self isolation, treatment for cancer in June, been off work since Feb.
I feel anxious about everything, I feel like so much has happened in a short space of time and still have the worry of if my treatment has worked (find out in November).
I was hoping to go back to work at the beginning of Sept and I'm feeling so anxious about it which I know is normal to have some anxiety but it feels so much worse than normal anxiety.
I don't know what to do will the feeling of anxiety pass once I go back to work or do I need to seek help from my GP before then.
Im sorry if this sounds a silly question I don't have much experience with anxiety.

I think it might be worth speaking to your GP, see if they can possibly refer you for counselling? You've had a lot of stress x

FWIW, excercise, yoga and mindfullness helps my anxiety quite a bit.

@SpongeBobJudgeyPants thanks I do find exercise helps mine too, try and get out for a walk to clear my head. I think its just worse at night time when I have more time to think about stuff

Yes, I know what you mean. I find a bath at night helps relax me a bit, and an early night with a book distracts me a bit. How are you doing today?

Definitely talk to your GP.
You shouldn’t be suffering like this. He/she may suggest more time off work, medication or counselling.
Do you think you feel ready to go back to work?

@Dohorseseatapples
I don't think I feel ready to go back to work, I want to go back as it will be a step back into some normality in my life but I just don't feel ready yet. I think I am pushing myself to go back too much.

Then you don’t go back. You must see your GP and explain.
Sometimes we just need to ‘exist’ and heal: Get up, have a shower, eat, sleep and build up your strength mentally and physically.
It takes far longer than you would think.

I had a cancer diagnosis and treatment last year which left me feeling in a very anxious state afterwards, and still am. The shock of hearing those words, the surgery I had, not everything going as it should be then being told you’re cured off you go left me in complete shock. It’s only months on that I’m processing any of it. I attended a Hope Course with MacMillan where it was explained that everything I was feeling/experiencing was normal. Everything happened so fast my brain wasn’t able to keep up.
I honestly couldn’t understand why, that now I was cured, wasn’t I euphoric and desperate to go back to how things were. Unfortunately the main problem was that I have changed irrevocably and I have to adapt to that. My family understood better than I did that I wasn’t ready to go back to work and after seeing my gp was signed off for quite some time. Eventually I left my job, mainly because I didn’t enjoy it, didn’t want to waste anymore time doing something it didn’t like anymore, I’m lucky I’m in a position that I could leave and try to work on my mental recovery.
My diagnosis etc was pretty much the same time scale as yours and looking back to September I couldn’t have coped. If you don’t feel ready don’t push yourself to return, this is the one time you need to be selfish. I understand that it maybe the thing that helps you move on but once you go back it’s hard to go off again. Also colleagues have very short memories after the initial welcoming you back you’re soon expected to pick up where you left off. Friends that have returned soon find that they’re expected to do the same as they did before cancer while still struggling with fatigue, treatment side effects etc.

I’m sorry you’ve been through so much but please put yourself first, don’t rush if you don’t have to and be kind to yourself.

Small goals, don't rush back. When you go back to work, do the longest phased return, see your doc/occupational health.

Keep trying to share this but can't and then lose my post! After surgery, much later, I found an article called "after the treatment finishes then what" by P Harvey, it summed up how I felt so well and wished I'd found it sooner, v cathartic. If you google it , it comes up first.

op.

@July56 and @Homebodiva

Thanks both I think I have realised now that I have been pushing myself to get back to normal without realising i need to find my new normal. Im quite lucky my cancer is quite easy to treat I don't need chemo or radiation but i still find it difficult to deal with.

I read the piece by P Harvey and your right it is very cathartic.