No one to talk to

[Glacierminty]

Long term poster . I’m feeling quite vulnerable and I have no one I can talk to. I have a long term High functioning mental health condition but occasionally I get sudden very very Low moods where I literally can’t cope with my feelings anymore . The last two days have been like this and I feel like a ticking time bomb. I know it will pass but the severity of the low mood scares me. My life just feels pointless and wasted.
My condition has dominated my entire life.
I feel on the verge of tears constantly.
Years of therapy haven’t helped.
I have no friends. No career. No skills.
I feel like others deserve life more.

It’s good that you recognise this will pass, I’m sorry things are so tough at the minute. Do you have the number for your local crisis team?

Please contact the Samaritans or someone so you can talk today. There are some contact details for different organisations on the link. I hope things feel better for you soon

www.nhs.uk/conditions/stress-anxiety-depression/mental-health-helplines/

Thanks for replying.
No I don’t have a number for the crisis team.
I would be too embarrassed to call anyone anyway. I do occasionally email The Samaritans but it’s not an instant response.

Sorry things are especially rough right now. Have you been able to get out for a walk?

I could have written your post myself
I’m sorry you feel so low at the moment, just hang in there, it will pass
I have inexplicable bouts of feeling that I can’t carry on can’t sink any lower and I need help, then I can just spring right back out of it
I know it’s so hard to be positive but try and keep busy and active and know that things will get better soon x

I’m sorry you have experience of feeling this too Mummypig.

I haven’t been out for a walk yet today. I’m reluctant to walk alone. My condition makes it hard when I’m not coping.

Sorry Mummiepig

It’s like getting trapped inside your head with all the overwhelming feelings and having no way to escape it. Sadly I cannot escape myself.

I’m having a good day today but I don’t know why, I don’t know why I get the bad days
I try and watch a funny film (Cat in the hat is my favourite!)and eat lots of chocolate, maybe push yourself to go out for a walk, it’s wet here I like to put on my wellies go in the lanes and jump in the puddles when no one is watching!!

I really feel what your saying, everything is pointless and it’s a sad lonely world where your mind taunts you and puts you down
That’s why you need distractions
I wish I could take my own advice sometimes!!

Distraction is good if you can find something. I tend to procrastinate terribly or take to my bed when it’s bad. Can I ask you Mummiepig ? Has it stopped you from doing things you’ve wanted to do all your life?

Can I ask why you feel embarrassed?

I’m not sure why but it would feel odd to verbally speak to a stranger . I would feel stupid.

Ummm I think it started when I was 16, and still haunts me now (43) I moved schools age 9 and never made friends again really, just stumbling through life from one disaster the next really, I don’t believe in myself and never try through fear of failure so I’m stuck in a rut of no friends and a crap job in a cost cutters!
I always want to get help when I’m crying and thinking about motorway bridges but then a colleague will
Make me laugh or my cat does something funny or I get a really good sleep and the cloud lifts again
So I don’t ring the doctors
I wish it would go away forever

I’m trying harder now when I have a good day to make plans and push myself to do things I want to do

Im sorry your feeling like this, ive not been so great the last few weeks, currently still in bed and just want to hide away from the world. I dont like talking to anyone really but i find forums like these help. Just knowing your not the only one going through this helps i think.

Im going to push myself to do something so im goi g to test some makeup looks (not that id wear out, just to pass time), if i feel ok im going to shower and take it from there. Little bits of progress as a time.

I like watching youtube videos, just makeup reviews or something helps me turn my brain off a bit. James and robert welsh make me laugh and their podcast is good. Ive also recently discovered asmr (stacy Aster) and it helps me when im trying to sleep. Xxxx thoughts are with you op

I would thoroughly recommend cat in the hat film to lift anyone’s mood
I have to go now, I hope you feel better soon
I’ll check in later with you, take care x

You are more or less the same age as me Mummiepig , I’m 44. It’s difficult reflecting on a life dominated by feeling awful.
I have had friends but have lost them over the years . Partly my fault ( if I withdraw socially ) but I have been treated badly by friends. The loss haunts me really.
Feel free to personal message me on here Mummiepig if you would like to.

I will look for the film thanks Mummiepig !

Bananaman123 - I’m sorry you are also suffering. Mumsnet can be a great help as you say just knowing that others are feeling similar can help. Sometimes just getting a reply can make you feel less lonely.
I watch a lot of ASMR. I find it calms me. I have developed the habit of sleeping with it on my pillow though. Probably bit habitual but it’s helping me right now. I haven’t heard of that ASMR person. I will look them up. A mumsnetter recommended SouthernASMR to me. I find her videos very relaxing. She does shelf tidying in shops and sorting through jewellery or reading shop leaflets etc. I think it just switches your mind off onto something else. X

OP, you could text SHOUT to 85258. Its like Samaritans but the conversation you have is via text message rather than verbal. They are there 24/7 x

StrawberryCloud thanks I’ve never heard of that. X

Just checking in with you, how you feeling now?