Re: Too much imagination

[wensley]

Hi there,
Feel a bit of fraud as I'm not a young mum but a grandmother. And you'd think I know better by my great age(well not that great ) but my anxiety about my grandson and his health is taking over my life. He is 4 years old and I adore him Unfortunately in his first year he suffered from bad chest infections and was diagnosed with asthma. Asthma is one illness I have always been terrified of, due to having a neighbour years ago with a badly asthmatic son.
Last year grandson seemed a lot better and managed about 10 months with a clear chest and no medication. Then this summer had a very bad bout of tonsillitis and chest infection and has been on inhalers again since.
I am now paranoid about him, feel sick, shakey, etc etc - all the usual boring stuff!
I do try to keep this to myself as much as poss as know it would be very irritating for my daughter who doesn't need her mother being crazy!
I am not like this about anything else, just totally health and grandson!
Any advice please? I really despise myself for being so pathetic.

My son has the same diagnosis - we are just about to use his brown inhaler again after a quiet summer (praise be!)

My son had croup that wouldn't go away, and it took the doctors four years to diagnose it as upper respiratory asthma (not on his chest, but in his throat)

I know it is worrying to have a long-term illness but by all accounts, kids can grow out of it.

Our kids (well mine, your grand...!) are still very young and could well grow out of it, especially as they have LONG periods without the need of inhalers. I'd have thought that if it was a horrendous and aggressive asthma that they would need the steroids and inhalers, nebulizers and the works to keep a steady level of wellness but with a 10 month gap of inhaler use (even if it was last yr), it doesn't seem that aggressive, even if there are rough periods for them both.

I really hope you are able to "cling" to the fact that he has had nearly a whole year without his inhaler - that is amazing, honestly.

The bout of tonsillitis and chest infection was a blip (albeit a big one) in the inhaler free time - it will come again, once his body is stabilised again. My son has to live on his inhaler (brown one) twice a day for the most of winter to keep him stable, then in summer he stays off it - maybe one day in the whole summer he will need it. Your grandson will be the same - this reliance is only temporary I rekon, until his body is wholly over the infections which can linger in a small, relatively low immunized body.

wensley, you're not being pathetic.
But perhaps you need to remind yourself how effective the medications are, and how quickly children bounce back.
Maybe speak to your GP about your anxieties, and ask them any questions about asthma that may be worrying you.

My DS2 has twice been hospitalised with asthma in the past year, so I know how scary it can be.

Bless you for replying Do appreciate it. My brain knows one thing but the rest of me doesn't! If you know what I mean
Just feel I should have managed to get on top of these panic attacks by now, but the gloomy thoughts get such a grip on me.
But thanks again, do appreciate being listened to, as do try and keep it to myself generally.

is it a full on panic attack where you can't breathe etc? If so, may I suggest a trip to the GP as that is worse than just worrying, I think

oh and by the way - grandparents are parents, you are a mum and so not a fraud!

Could you book an appointment in Boots to discuss asthma - take your g/s and ask if he is using the inhaler properly or something to open the doorway (or go to see the nurse at the GPs?)

I am just wondering if the extra medical discussion will help instead of basing the worry on what you have experienced from your neighbours son who may well have a far more aggressive version?

no not a total full on panic attack, had those in my twenties so know about those! Sort of semi panic attack Feel violently sick, skin feels prickly, slight breathlessness sort of thing. Feel desperate urge to go to sleep or conversely, can't sleep.
Yes probably need to see GP, same problem of brain and rest of me in competition, brain says see GP, rest of me says Get Over Yourself, people have much greater problems than this
But thanks again, does help a lot hearing from people who know about asthma.