My 8 year old son needs help

[DMJMum]

This is my second child, a son. First, S1 is nearing 10 now. Third is a daughter D, 6.

S2 is a lovely boy, but he can't put his point by reasoning. He will have to shout in his loudest voice which sometimes becomes shrieks, even for little disagreement with his brother or mum. He will have to have it his way, always. He is OK in school and does not show these symptoms while at school or with other children or adults outside the house.

I need practical help please. Thank you in advance for all your contributions.

If it's only happening at home it's likely behavioural rather than pathological. What have you tried it terms of consequences etc?

hi theproblemwitheyes,

It is behavioural, I agree. If you mean what I do in order to quell the situation, I use my calmness to calm him down, and negotiate a deal. This takes 5 minutes and nerves of steel. Then it will start again soon.

This has been going on for several years but I am reporting only now. Is there some kind of therapy available on the NHS? I have done some research and S2 may have ASD.

My friends tell me that he will grow out of it eventually and does not need treatment, but sometimes I tend to lose my nerve. Even neighbours in the flat next door have complained about the noise which IS irritating.

Have you had him assessed? Have you tried any sort of rewards/sanctions system?

If it's only happening at home it's likely behavioural rather than pathological.

That isn't correct.

Many neurodiverse DC hold it together at school and out of the house but fall apart/meltdown/explode at home because they can no longer continue to mask. This is especially relevant if you suspect DS2 may have ASD.

It doesn't necessarily mean the problem is their homelife. It could be that there are unmet needs at school which is increasing their anxiety and taking a significant amount of mental resources to cope during the school day.

Ask the GP for a referral for an ASD assessment.