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Advice on how to support my son

2 replies

Timeandtune · 24/06/2020 22:15

DS2 is almost 21 and has just graduated with a first. He has always been a solitary boy with lots of anxieties and low self esteem.

At school he was offered the opportunity to undergo an autism assessment but he chose to decline saying he would rather not know.

He has been on a fairly even keel through uni, worked hard , went on placement but didn’t socialise much. He chose not to go away from home although we thought this was be good for his development.

Since he got word of his degree he has been working on his CV and looking for jobs to apply for. In his field there are still plenty of jobs.
My big worry is that in the past few days he has virtually stopped eating. He says he is hungry but can’t eat. He has told me that he weighs 10 stone. He is 6 foot tall so this pretty light.

Last week he said he would like to speak to a therapist but the next day he had changed his mind.

I have no idea how to support him with his eating. I don’t want to nag but should I be saying or doing anything?
Sorry this is such an essay. I am very worried and would appreciate any advice.

OP posts:
LouiseTrees · 24/06/2020 23:05

My brother is like this, also got a first. 6’4” and like 10 stone at one point. He’s gained weight now. Key thing my mum did was just to leave things around he liked(out of cupboards), offer him tea and biscuits all the time (think Mrs Doyle from father ted). He didn’t take her up on it straight away and she never forced it but it was like subliminal messages really that he should eat. Then gradually he had the tea or a cola but not the good and she’d sit an chat about his worries and then gradually he ate more.

Timeandtune · 24/06/2020 23:11

Thanks so much Louise . That is really reassuring. I am going to copy your mum’s strategy. I really appreciate your reply.

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