Help sorry don’t know if it’s the right place

[FreedomBird]

I am feeling lonely and suicidal. I don’t want to cause alarm but I would like a hand hold this evening if anyone is around?

Don’t want to be a drama llama. Just need a friend.

I know chat isn’t the right place but please direct me to the right place. Thank you all

I would like some head space but I just don’t know how to get it.
I worry that I’m broken. That maybe I can’t be happy. Maybe I’m just one of life’s broken ones.

Darling, nobody is normal! I promise you. I think you desperately need space. Mental and physical. Let's talk about the suicidal thoughts. Because I promise you, you have so much to give and say and live for - that much is clear from your writing

Children are knackering regardless of their age.
Having them at home all day must be exhausting too.

You're not a burden or broken. You're overwhelmed!

Drama Llama is one of my favourite sayings. You are clearly funny. And you care enough to talk about this. It will be ok. Honestly, it will.

Hi OP, now is a really tough time to be moving in with/living with someone, and living with someone is hard work. You are as normal as the rest of us, whatever normal means (particularly right now). Keep posting as long as you need to. Thank heavens for the internet! Never thought I’d say that. What makes you smile/laugh? I’m a sucker for funny cat videos and pictures. Someone sent me a video of a police officer who sings hits from Rocky Horror in his squad car - made me smile at how daft and loveable people are. 🌸

OP my Dh and i basically inhabit separate parts of the house most of the time - and that's totally ok. You don't always have to be 'on' with anyone. You're allowed to feel fragile and unsociable. And naps are the best. Never knock naps :)

I feel like a really nice person trapped in the body of someone who is just a bit of a twat.
I am so chill and also so needy! I just want people to love me!
I am a big over thinker and I analyse every thought and feeling and action. And I wish I didn’t.
I wish I knew how to just human a bit better. But I am needy and attention seeking. And even this thread is all about me and attention seeking. Which I simultaneously hate and also need.
I would make such a good friend but I am very misunderstood because I’m just a bit odd.

It doesn’t take much for me to laugh. I take a lot of joy from life actually.
I just have a sad streak that means I never fully switch off from reality. I am always fully aware of myself. Always fully aware of how I don’t match up to the ideals in my head.

I understand.
Allow yourself to take yourself off for a nap.
My dh does this.
I encourage it as he's always happier and healthy for it.

Be kind to yourself
Say nice things to yourself
Do same to others.

Freedombird you're amazing. You just described all of us. And you are wise, because not many people have true self awareness, like you do. So please appreciate yourself.
What you just wrote is me too:

I feel like a really nice person trapped in the body of someone who is just a bit of a twat.
I am so chill and also so needy! I just want people to love me!
I am a big over thinker and I analyse every thought and feeling and action. And I wish I didn’t.
I wish I knew how to just human a bit better. But I am needy and attention seeking. And even this thread is all about me and attention seeking. Which I simultaneously hate and also need.
I would make such a good friend but I am very misunderstood because I’m just a bit odd.

Morning all, just wanted to pop back and thank you all for being there in my hour of need. You’re all amazing. I just needed to felt heard and you heard me. It was what I needed to get through a particularly crappy bit. I’m feeling more positive today and it’s a new day, nearly a new week and this morning I started to hate on myself and I stopped myself. I will NOT hate myself today.

I need to stick up for myself! I’m my own biggest bully.

Anyway,

Big unmunsnetty hugs

Have a lovely Saturday. And thanks lovely people of mumsnet. 💐

I hope you have a lovely weekend as well.