How to stop thinking..

[WestCovina]

about the situation that is making me sad?

I am having a really hard time at the moment. I don’t have really have any friends and I’m driving my husband bananas going on and on about the same situation but I am finding it all consuming, it’s all I can think I about and it’s stopping me from being able to do anything. I’ve never felt this bad before. I have clinical depression but it doesn’t usually manifest in this way. I don’t know how to pull myself out of it. I can’t even do the things that would usually distract me because nothings working

You have to try and accept that this is all our new reality.
We have to build a different routine .

Try breathing exercises, the 4x4 is easy and calming. Breathe in for 4 counts and out for 4 counts. Imagine your breath is like the waves flowing in and out.

When you feel panicky make yourself a hot drink (decaf preferably!) or play upbeat music, watch something funny on tv/ YouTube. Paint, bake, sew, knit, write everything down in a journal.
Do Yoga videos on YouTube.

Walk your dog(if you have one).

Look at 5 different Love languages and how you interact with your husband.

YouTube is a wealth of knowledge and so is Pinterest.

Any subject that is bothering you, you can look it up and get information on it!

I have severe depression and anxiety. For the past couple of years I have researched my crappy childhood and neglect.
I have researched about cluster b personality disorders :
Narcissists/psychopaths/sociopaths

AS I was married to an abusive charmer, who messed with my head!

Now I understand their traits and how I was manipulated my depression has eased, not gone, but I realise I was controlled and treated badly by people/family/husband who I trusted.

Hope this may help you.

Take care, stay safe and stay well! X💐🌺💐🌺

Thank you @lexiepuppy

I am really trying. Part of my difficulty is that I know I’m at least in part the problem but I don’t know how to change. I know I’m being vague but the whole thing is pathetic and embarrassing especially with all the CV stuff going on at the moment.

I can’t even bring myself to put on music or do anything remotely nice to try and bring myself out of it

I think it's difficult if you're seeing the activities you're trying as a 'distraction' as it's easy to remember that there's something you're trying to distract yourself from.

I think that's why so many people are wholeheartedly throwing themselves into new activities for their own sake while they have 'this extra time' - because reframing their thoughts makes it far easier to focus on the thing they're trying to get into.

I think that mediation and mindfulness techniques can often help people to feel less like they're being pulled into something (not just lockdown) against their will, and to appreciate the present moment, whatever that looks like.

It's like in Kimmy Schmidt when she was trapped in.the bunker for years and told herself that a person can cope with anything for 10 seconds. And if you can cope for 10 seconds, you can cope for another 10 seconds, and so on.

Oh my darling, you sound like you need to Love yourself more💖, as the cliche goes!

How about pampering yourself?
A lovely bubble bath and just relax.
You could listen to some soothing music, or read a book.
Paint your nails, give yourself a manicure/pedicure .

Sort out your wardrobe.

Take this time with CV to just make yourself feel better.

Have you watched the programme on BBc2 called Race Across the world?

It is full of adventure and colourful places, whilst couples compete to win money, but it is there experiences and life stories which are so interesting.
I would watch light hearted stuff on the tv. My teenage daughter and I are watching reruns of Glee!

Don’t watch the news, I’m sure your DH will update you. Keep everything light and easygoing.
You have to protect your MH.

Guided meditation is great for MH, they have good ones on YouTube.

Or light a candle and watch it, acknowledge your thoughts and let them pass.

Listen to solfeggio frequencies on YouTube, these are soothing, find one that you like.

Buy some Bach Flower Rescue Remedy and take that, put some in water and drink it, it will help to soothe you.

Look at ways to self regulate, one technique is to put your right hand over your heart and left hand on your stomach. Hold this pose to self calm.

This situation is temporary and we are so lucky to have the NHS , food that is available and roofs over our heads.

We will get through this, it will pass.

Stay strong 💪! Love 💖 yourself more. Just be gentle with yourself at this time!🌹🌼🌻🌹🌼🌻

Also, if you haven't already, pop over to the positive mental health thread:

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/coronavirus/3858840-The-positive-mental-health-thread-part-4

You have OCD by the sounds of it.

That makes sense @LonginesPrime, I guess I trying to force the distraction too hard. I don’t feel I can join in to that thread as it’s not about CV..

Thank you again @lexiepuppy, my issues aren’t related to CV but I can still use a lot of your advice 💜

@samcarpy92 I don’t think I do. I work with people with OCD and I can’t relate to their struggles at all, I think it’s just a very bad depression episode.

If you can’t control what you’re thinking about it’s OCD or pure O which is just the obsessive or intrusive thoughts which you don’t want but can’t shake.

I didn’t think I had OCD either I just thought I was going nuts until I was diagnosed as all I thought OCD was is tidying and hand washing etc.