Am I paranoid or am I on to something?

[EllaFitzgeraldFan]

This is about a relationship but please I don’t want it moved to that sub forum as it’s cruel and I can’t deal with it at the moment. If not appropriate delete. I don’t know if my paranoia is getting to me and I’ve imagined this but I am convinced my boyfriend is going on dating apps when he is working abroad. I know it’s nasty to accuse without evidence but my anxiety was through the roof and I had to ask, he has denied it. However he doesn’t seem shocked. I feel like the woman from the yellow wallpaper. Am I being made to doubt myself and made to believe I am unwell and paranoid or is this really, objectively a strange reaction????? I feel twitchy and like i want to be knocked out.

I think you are reading too much into it... what makes you think he is? Xx

Why do you think he's on dating apps?

I think his reaction is completely normal and reassuring tbh. If he was lying about it surely his denial would be over the top.

I don’t know but aside from this issue I have a strong sense of panic and suspicion. I am sitting here now on my sofa and I just feel terrible. Like someone is spying at me through the window maybe (I know they aren’t but it’s how I feel). I have put Coronation Street on and having a cup of tea but it isn’t helping me

What makes you think he is using dating sites?

Maybe he doesn’t seem shocked because he understands that you worry about things?

Am I being made to doubt myself and made to believe I am unwell and paranoid

I can't see that happening in your screenshot.

Sorry cross posted.

Really sorry you are feeling like that. A cup of tea sounds like a very good idea.

Do you often feel panicked? Do you have any tools or techniques for making yourself feel calmer in these situations?

I think you may need to see a GP/health professional about your anxiety/paranoia levels.

You need to get this under control before you drive him away, particularly if there's no evidence your partner is doing anything wrong

He sounds lovely and you sound like you need some help for your anxiety . Are you on medication?

How are you otherwise, OP? It's not possible for anyone here to comment if 'is he, isn't he' on dating apps from what you've posted.

Why do you suspect he is? What's your relationship like?

I checked his emails. Tinder notification.

I don’t think he seemed too surprised by the question imo. I’d be pretty shocked and confused if my DH asked me that.

You checked his emails before or after you asked him?

After

I’m going to bed to weep

I don't know anything about Tinder but I can tell you that I constantly get email notifications from other dating sites. God knows why as I've never used a dating site. Is it possible he's getting the same, unsolicited notifications?