doc has referred me to psychiatrist and i'm scared now

[numbmum]

i kind of asked for it to be honest, well i think i should have a go at counselling because i seem unable to be physically well for long.

i keep getting different things wrong with me and my faith in my ability to be well has been shot. this has been since a difficult pregnancy, conceived with fertility drugs, followed by chest infections, kidney infections, allergic responses, gastric issues, hospitalisation. I agree i also get anxiety and panic attcks and bad mood swings

dh tinks there's something wrong physically abd i should try acupuncture again (which i tried after having 6 consecutive courses of antibiotics leaving me with shot gastric system)

i'm willing to believe it could be in my head now but i'm rather scared

what will he ask, talk about?

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Well, guidelines for psychiatric practice dictate that no-one should be assessed/treated for medically unexplained physical symptoms unless full investigations of their physical complaints have been done. To do otherwise would possibly be dangerous.

However, a psychiatrist would be worth seeing if you are experiencing ongoing anxiety symptoms anyway.

But make sure you do get any physical symptoms properly checked before chalking them up to anxiety.

i don't feel depressed though, i just feel sick to death of feeling ill

Dont be scared the person you are going to see is just a human being like me and you, they will listen to you and if you feel that afterwards its not for you then you have tried, i think that you proberbly will benefit from speaking to a stranger and to be honest being so ill for a long time takes its toll so a non demanding chat may just what you need

will it be like a life history thing do you think? will i have to talk about irrelevant things like my family and stuff?

thank you for sparing the tme - i don't want to start stresing over this as well

The psychiatrist will "take a history". This will involve asking you to talk about different parts of your life: physical health, employment, family life etc. The idea is that this gives them a really full picture of your life, so that they can help you pinpoint what is making you feel bad (if anything).

Hi numbmum,

Not feeling anything could point to being depressed though. If I had been as physically ill persistently as you have been then you have a right to be angry/grumpy/depressed about it.

I'm a counsellor and when I get stressed or low my right arm tingles, I grind my teeth in bed and my lower back aches - all of these minor niggles alert me to the fact that I'm stressed. Before I trained to be a psychotherapist I had untreated depression which manifested itself physically (so serious physically I was tested for multiple sclerosis)- your physical being and mental health are very connected.

You say you've got anxiety, panic attacks, and bad mood swings - they are 'in your head' but feel really bloody real don't they ?

You don't need to divide it up between something physically being wrong with you and something mentally being wrong with you - just try and be openminded to it maybe be being a combination of the two. If you end up having something more physically wrong with you then having counselling can help with coping with it.

And unfortunately 'irrelevant family stuff' - it may be irrelevant, it may not be - I can only speak for myself but I had a somewhat 'harsh' upbringing where problems were physical or they didn't exist - this really unhelpful attitude was passed on to me and caused me to think there must be something physically wrong with me.

If you do end up being recommended for talking therapy with a counsellor then it's important to find someone you like and can connect with.

Try not to worry about the psychiatrist - most of my clients are under them and they can be really helpful.

Hi numbum

I was referred to a psychiatrist a couple of years ago because I was contemplating suicide. I was terrified, thought they'd lock me up and take all control away from me. Actually all they did was talk, take a full history as the others had said and put things down to a very bad relationship break-up. I never went back, but I did have a very supportive GP and had counselling through her. It is scary, but it's really fine, and you might find it a huge relief. You won't be labelled or stigmatised which is what I was scared of.

It's just a little bit more help, Numbmum, you should take it and see how it works out.

I had a bad time a few years ago (caring for aged relatives coupled with rising alcohol problem and finally I tipped over the edge.) I actually begged for help and was taken under the wing of a psych team for a while.

The psychs were all understanding and completely non-judgemental and it was good to be able to unload all my worries and bad, dark thoughts - and talking about ME, about my problems, doesn't come easily to me - but they made it easy. Partly I suppose because I felt it was OK to talk to them about things as they weren't involved, in a way I could never really share with my family (in case of worrying them, and because they were too close to me, etc.) Just as you don't quite know what is wrong with you, I didn't either, but just being able to pass it all on was an enormous help and a relief.

It really got me back on track and I never think the less of myself for having had those problems and nor should you - accept that many of us have a few mental difficulties from time to time - more people than you would think - and recover fully as I have, and you will too, if you accept all the help that's going. Think of it as offloading your sad feelings onto a broader shoulder, to someone who's seen it all before.

Good luck to you, sweetheart. My heart goes out to anyone stuck in that dark place - but it WILL be temporary if you take a little bit of help. Remember there are lots of us who've been in the same boat, and who've come out the other side without lasting effects, and so will you.

Hi numbmum, how old is your lo?

I saw a psychiatrist during and just after my pg - I had AND and the most awful panic attacks. Most of it really kicked in when I went on mat leave and work was no longer a distraction. She was fab, helped me put things in to perspective and understand that I wasn't going mad (a common feeling with panic attacks).

Also agree with Lauriefairycake, talking about things that may seem irrelevant can be of huge benefit. I am a great advocate of counselling as it has really worked for me.

Good luck with your appointment, go with an open mind.

sorry that didn't come out right!! I mean things that might seem irrelevant to you are often subconsciously linked to present feelings, therefore talking about them enables you to see things differently and hence, change the way you perceive them.

(does that make any sense!?)

I've been to a psych and I found it helpful in that it allowed me to figure out the route of some of my problems just by talking about it. We often don't get a chance just to speak unedited about our lives, and sometimes being asked the right questions about our past, situations which could have affected us, may lighten that load a bit.

I agree about mental and emotional stuff manifesting physically. I good example of this for me is that when I am stressed or down my psoriasis gets really bad. My skin does seem to reflect exactly what's going on inside my head and then I know I have to do something about it.

Please don't worry, psychiatrist are highly trained professionals and will know the right questions so ask. I wish you well and hope you get some relief from your health problems.

gosh you're all so lovely

one of my big problems i suppose is that when I feel ok I can't really remember how bad it was when i was feeling bad. My mood has lifted and I suddenly feel like the biggest fraud actually doing this

i'm also outwardly extremely confident and friendly and find it hard not to put that face on with outsiders

the way i feel today i just feel he's going to think i'm making it up for some kind of attention

someone asked how old my child is, the youngest is 3 and starting pre-school this month