some days you just can't help

[yingers74]

Hello all,

Just thought I would have a moan, not sure why I feel so down but I guess I am tired of smiling, trying and dealing with things. Do you ever get days when you just want to stay in bed? When you wonder why you give and try with everyone but don't get anything back? Everyone around you seems to have exciting lives and all i can talk about is the contents of dd's nappy! I know it is partly in my head and I am just having a bad day, but I really feel like I am stuck in a rut today with little to look forward to

hope you are all having a better weekend

the title should read 'feeling cr8p'

Hi yingers, I am just on my way to bed and am a little tiddly but I didn't want you to feel no-one cared.

Yes, I do feel like that quite often - but (hope I don't sound blase here) it passes. Best thing to do is to get out of the house, be with people (have a coffee with a friend), and have some "me" time.

If the "feeling crap" feeling perseveres, then it's worth seeing your GP.

Hope tomorrow is a better day for you.

moo xxx

Message withdrawn

hello marthamoo and essbee,

thanks for caring, I am feeling better today, guess i just needed to vent. Am probably going to have other bad days so expect more moaning.

I think a lot of it has to do with the days getting shorter, things always seem worse when it gets cold and dark!

Have a great week

Hi yingers! Everyone has days like that. Sometimes, you have chunks of time like that. Sometimes, you have lots of chunks of times like that - and sometimes, none for ages.

You need to be able to differentiate between the feeling-shit-about-everything-today-but-will-feel-better-soon and the more long term, stop-the-world-I-want-to-get-off / I-am-a-crap-person-with-no-future feelings

Some days, I am driving to / from work, and I really do start to think I wonder what would happen if I didn't get off at my exit and just kept on driving. course, I never do that and usually bring myself to the edge of tears thinking I would never see my children again etc etc but some days, it all seems so hard and I want to run away. Some days, I just want to sleep for ever - I don't want to die, I just want to have an off button. Other days, I wonder why I feel like that.

I wonder if October time is generally bad cos I feel pretty crap about everything the last few weeks and so tired, I don't think I can put one foot infront of the other some days

Roll on Spring!

It's called being human - but completely justified. Had a huge 'dark' day yesterday getting stressed about my homebirth with unenthusiastic midwives; worried that when the baby is here, will I feel cut off? Won't see my friends as they will be at work; etc etc. I am going to make an effort to get involved with new mums via local NCT, but it does feel odd doesn't it - that whole 'first day at school making new friends' thing. MUMSNET we should organise our own coffee days! Anyway, keep those ears up Y74 -join the NCT and before you know it, you'll be spending cosy autumn days in coffee shops with other mums and joining in with all the other mad activities they have on offer. xxx

Sorry - but I am new to MUMSNET - take a look at the 'Meet-ups' section in Talk??? Mums are meeting up all over the country - how good is that. Check it out asap, can't wait to have my first small person and see if anyone lives in Muswell Hill N10!!!!

just given birth 11 days ago. Got 3rd degree tear and picked up infection in hospital. Home now but feeling very low and afraid will not bond with baby. Can anyone help?

Don't know if you've already done this scruff but it might be better to post a new thread. If you don't know how to, click on the heading ie Feeling Low instead of the thread title. hope you feel better soon.

Hi Scruff. Sorry to hear that you are feeling so down. I think that you are still in the early days of getting over the physical and emotional after effects of the birth, and I would be astounded if you were not seriously sleep deprived as well. You are still healing from what sounds to have been a difficult birth. When you are exhausted and in pain, I think it does diminish your confidence. What I am trying in my terribly rambling way to say is that feeling down/sore/disappointed/like a thunderbolt of responsibility has struck you is I think quite normal in the first few weeks of motherhood. In terms of bonding; I think its different for every woman. Some mums do the "textbook" love at first sight type bonding; whereas for me, and I am sure plenty of other mums it was more of a gradual thing, like building up a relationship over the course of a few months. 11 days is also very early days in terms of your hormones sorting themselves out after birth - it may well be a brief "baby blues" spate of feeling low that will clear in a few days.

Do you have much support from family/friends? Your midwife should I think be still visiting, and can also check how well stitches etc are healing.

take care
x