Mixed episode

[Theodoreb]

I don't know where the hell I am one minute I'm down the next I'm manic sometimes at the same time. I feel suicidal but full of energy one minute then I'm laughing and crying the next. It's confusing me right out the voices in my head are going nuts I been seeing the girl out of the film The Ring I think it's called. I have bipolar and schizophrenia and right now I just don't know how I'm supposed to feel don't know one minute from the next so I'm going to cook dinner and pour myself a large whiskey and see what good that does not eating today haven't eaten in days but one minute I don't want to because I wang to hurt myself the next I don't want to cus I feel so hyper don't feel like eating.

I hate mixed states. I don't get them anymore because I take lithium. I can get high or low on lithium but no mixed states anymore.

I am medicated I take olanzapine lamotrogene diazepam clonazepam zopiclone and mirtazapine still have episodes just not as severe I too hate mixed episodes find them the hardest to cope with and my psychosis is always at its worst on a mixed episode but one bonus points my mixed episodes are always the shortest.

I have episodes too but no mixed states. I take lithium, lurasidone, lamotrigine, sertraline and mirtzapine. And also prn olanzapine when needed. And still I get episodes of depression, paranoia and hypomania.

Thanks for replying means a lot just having someone to chat to who understands. I am coping right now no need for emergency services but I will be alerting my mum who will watch me closely till episode passes part of me wants to switch to a depression as even though I'll feel like crap I'll be in control half of me wants to switch to mania even knowing all the damage I'll cause because at least I'll be out of pain. Not like I have a choice no one with bipolar does but don't know which one I would choose if I did have a choice. Do I hurt myself or those around me. I want to say I'll hurt myself but worried I'm not strong enough to stick to that decision.

Sorry punctuation terrible always is when my mood is up.

Sounds horrible. I hope it passes soon.

I get mixed episodes with psychosis. Depressive thoughts and feelings, combined with all the energy pulsing through me of a high. I haven’t had a true ‘high’ for years. The medication (Lamotrgine, agomelatine, Quetiapine, carbamazepine, prochlorperazine, lorazepam, zopliclone) still don’t stop the mixed episodes or the lows. The only good thing is that I haven’t had an admission for 2.5 years. At one point I was in every 3-4 months. I bloody hate hospital!

@historyrocks I have also been admission free for 4 years now so I am proud and even tho I have episodes they are nowhere near as bad now.

Didn't sleep last night which isn't good I tried all night just couldn't sleep and then at 6 this morning fell asleep when I had to be up at 7 which is bloody typical. Hopefully I can get some sleep tonight mood feels a bit more stable.