Adult ADHD

[Didiplanthis]

Hi, has anyone had a diagnosis of adult ADHD ? What difference did it make to you if so ? I've got an assessment this week and I'm not sure what I want from it. On the outside I'm a together, high achieving professional with children. Inside I feel I'm living my life on the edge of chaos and I'm so very tired. I lose everything, I massively struggle to complete any tasks or meet deadlines, my house is a total mess (really bad!) I know I am bright but I spent my childhood being told i was disappointing and under achieving, I did ok but I knew I could do so much more I just couldn't get it together to do it. I have lots of high achieving Neuro diverse members of my family and my children have ASD. One also has ADHD and I feel I am watching me as a child.. it's surreal. I have tried treating my anxiety, and low self esteem with medication and CBT. It's helped but it's almost uncovered how chaotic I am.. I'm hanging on to this appointment in the hope something gets better !

Self acceptance.
Being able to ask for support at work (e.g. coaching from an external specialist provider- have a look at Genius Within).
Since diagnosis I have researched more into diet and nutrition, and am more likely to stick to a good diet etc. as I know it helps.
I haven't gone down the medication route, but that's an option too with a diagnosis. Good luck.

Hi. I’ve just been looking for a thread on exactly this. My son is being assessed for ADHD and while researching it I came across descriptions of manifestations in adult women and it was like they were looking into my soul.

What route have you taken to your assessment? I’m not sure I have any idea where to start.

I'm going privately. I chose to see a general psychiatrist who has a special interest in ADHD rather than a pure ADHD specialist as I felt I want a more holistic review. I'm not 'wanting' a diagnosis although will happily accept one if that makes sense ? I have anxiety and esteem issues but if these are based in neurodiversity I don't know ?

By the way Beetroot - I looked up genius within and the 1:1 consultation is exactly the sort of thing I want to access if diagnosed so thank you for the recommendation !

Did you have the assessment? How did it go?

I saw my GP today and she has referred me to a psychiatrist with an interest in adult ADHD. It’s a private referral (my very basic health cover will pay for ‘diagnosis only’) so hopefully I will be seen quite soon.

Glad to be of help. I discovered them by chance too as someone at work saw them.

I was diagnosed out of the blue (for me) in 2014 (?) and was medicated.

It's helped so much, knowing. And it all made sense. I didn't know anything except what people think they know about adhd. I didn't know that in women it usually became more obvious as we grow older and have more and more dumped on us (see: the mental load).

Ah OP hope it went well. At 15 dd was anxiou and depressed and self hsrming. She was v frustrated and whilst high performing under achieving for hwr ability (3A's rather than 12). Handwitingvalways an issue, room always a tip, flashes of utter brilliance folliwed by a lack of persistence with homework. Nobody ever raised a whisper of concern as she behaved well at school and was self contained.

At 16 she was predicted ABB for A'Level. She very nearly dropped out. At 17 she was diagnosed and started on Ritalin after a year of therapy and anti depressants and escalations. At the point of diagnosis every penny in the world dropped but I had never suspected.

Diagnosis helped her to understand her feelings andc anxiety and depresdion are common co-morbidities. But medication helped so much. At last she could concentrate. A year later she got 3A* A'Levels with two subjects above 99%. She reapplied for uni and after a gap year started at Cambridge where she is doing brilliantly.

It hasn't always been plain sailing, she still has issues with being tidy but is getting better. But at 21 she is far more at peace with herself and manages her mh well.

Good luck.

A teacher once suggested to DS he may have ADHD. He is 17 and displays a lot of the behaviours. He also has extreme mood swings. I had never heard of handwriting being an indicator though. His writing is atrocious. How did you start the process of diagnosis @OhTheRoses?

It found us really @sandgrown. DD was referred to camhs for self harm who diagnosed anxiety and low mood but refused any accessible intervention also refusing to renegotiate their paltry offer that would have made her worse. Rather than following their advice of getting a orivate counsellor off the internet I found a private consultant psychiatrist. It was a long old journey. DD had therapy and then ad's. She was seeing the psychiatrist about monthly and it was dd who expressed her view that something neurodevelopmental was wrong thinking asd. The psychiatrist then assessed and diagnosdd adhd. Whilst tbis was going on she had a crisis and via a&e was referred back to camhs. Because the hospital was so heavy handed we reengaged. The day after the camhs assessment the adhd was confirmed. I ranf camhs and the highly experienced mh nurse told me she was far too old for an adhd diagnosis. CAMHS had promised urgent therapy in relation to the od and then let us down.

DD is now under the adult adhd service but golly we had to fight for that.

In short, you will have to pay and then fight for follow up to achieve nhs prescribing and support. The system regrettably in our experience serves only to justify doing nothing and doesn't focus on the benefits to the individual or society of diagnosis and support to alliw people to live functional lives.

We live in Surrey so hopefully services may be better where you live.

Overall it cost about £6000 to support dd's recovery and the nhs simply didn't want to know preferring instead to try to blame parenting.

Thanks for sharing your experience @OhTheRoses. It sounds like an uphill struggle. I don't even know if he will accept help but I need to try as I want him to be happy . I hope your daughter is feeling better now .

Hello. My appt and follow up went really well. I had very thorough psych history taken and felt all possible aspects were considered. I then did a Diva questionairre and went back again. Apparently I have barn door inattentive ADHD and my anxiety and self esteem issues stem from never ever being quite good enough , trying hard enough, as unrecognised all through childhood. I feel a door has opened on my life. Reading the report was hard. It really stood out that this was me. That I am 'a bit different,' (not what report said!). But I've always known that. Seeing my struggles in black and white was tough though. Since diagnosis I have felt more comfortable in my skin. I can accept that I have achieved bloody miracles in the circumstances but still kind of feel it's my fault that I'm like this. I started meds 2 days ago. I can already feel a difference. My head is less rushy, I can focus more. I feel maybe there is hope for calm in my chaos.

This is fascinating. School have just suggested DD gets tested - she's struggling with friendships and organisation and work but is supposed to be bright so she's getting really depressed. Lots of things clicked once we started reading about it...

Thank you, Didi. I saw the psychiatrist for the first time today and next week I’m doing the Diva questionnaire. It’s all moving very fast. I’ve read through the questionnaire and some elements are very me and others not at all. Also I don’t have anyone who remembers me as a young child so no corroboration possible. Was that a big part of your questionnaire?

It is a big part of the questionairre but it can be answered from your memories. I actually had a bundle of my old school reports which confirmed it all !

I think I may have some too! Need to do some digging in the attic. I got told off so often for talking that I can’t believe it’s not mentioned in there somewhere.

Mine said - daydreamer , disorganized, messy, forgetful, could do so much better, must try harder etc etc....

If you don't mind me asking how do you go about a private diagnosis and how much did it cost? Two educational colleagues have identified that they think I have ADHD. I don't disagree but can't see me being a priority assessment on NHS.

I have basic health insurance which funds limited treatment if the NHS waiting lists are long. I get three private sessions, which should actually be enough. My GP referred me. I don’t know how typical her charges are but if I were paying for the three sessions myself it would cost about £700.

There is an ADHD clinic that she will refer me back into if I am diagnosed, although she is hoping we can get an extra couple of sessions agreed with the insurance people if that is the case as she wants to get me started on medication herself rather than have me wait for the clinic to see me. If insurance says no I may try to pay for that myself.

I self referred. First appt £280. Follow up £140.

I got a diagnosis at the end of my third session. Happily insurance will pay for three more sessions so she’s going to start me on meds at my next one.

Can’t believe it’s only just over a month since I read the symptoms.

NHS after over a year wait after I asked GP to refer.

Life changing. Meds are great. I spend so much less time criticising myself and being annoyed at me.

My child was repeatedly refused referral so took her to private clinic. I wish I’d done it sooner.

I am very thankful that I was able to do this privately, and I have two kids with possible ADHD waiting in queues that I can’t do anything about, so it’s ironic I’ve had this speedy experience.

I can’t quite imagine what meds will be like and am excited about it. Magically I am already less self-critical and have some honest conversations with friends that wouldn’t have been possible before.

I received a diagnosis of inattentive ADHD back in June, having already been diagnosed with ASD in November 2017. It makes a lot of sense. Day to day I feel it affects me more than ASD; I struggle with executive function, stuff like organisation and time management and so on.
I have some medication but I don’t take it that regularly. It’s a fairly low dose right now, so it remains to be seen as to what my optimal dose is.