Assault - can't get past it and don't know what to do

[NotMyRealName11]

Changed name for this because I wouldn't want anyone to be able to identify me.

A few weeks ago, I was sexually assaulted - in broad daylight - when I cut down an alleyway on the way to the shops. It was two strangers who I had never seen before.

I didn't report it and I didn't tell anyone because I wanted to just forget about it. It was a kind of "if I don't talk about it and don't think about it, it didn't happen" kind of reaction.

But... I keep running over it in my mind and I am constantly getting these random fits of panic and paranoid fears. I am getting to the stage where I feel like I need help to deal with it.

I almost told my GP, but chickened out in the appointment. I have family, friends, a partner, a child, but I cannot bring myself to say it out loud to anyone.

Can anyone advise at all about what the best course of action would be? And what I should expect to happen if I go ahead with this?

Sorry to offload anonymously on the internet...a bit weird...but I just can't say the words out loud. Actually, it seems like I can't even type the one particular word.

Thx in advance xx

Ah, and sorry - I probably should have put a trigger warning in the title :(

Not sure how to fix it and I genuinely hope nobody reads this and is upset.

I'm so sorry this has happened. Would you consider phoning a helpline to talk about it
Rape Crisis national freephone helpline on 0808 802 9999 (12-2.30pm and 7-9.30pm every day of the year)
free, 24-hour National Domestic Violence Helpline on 0808 2000 247
Also a local centre www.nhs.uk/Service-Search/Rape-and-sexual-assault-referral-centres/LocationSearch/364

Other people may know of other helplines.

Hi. Do you have anyone you feel comfortable telling, maybe write them a note that you got hurt recently and am struggling. Please ring rape crisis and speak to them if you can, they can be a supportive stepping stone to telling pwople who care about you.
You already can tell that keeping it inside is not helping and maybe even adding to the trauma you experienced

Thanks so much for the advice. I did ask MN to delete the thread 'cause I felt bad about the lack of subject warning.

I didn't know the Rape Crisis line and will def consider it, so thank you for that.

You've taken a brave first step OP.

Perhaps as others have said begin by speaking with someone anonymously who can then support you in how to tell someone in person. If you feel up to it.

Hey OP, not sure if you’re still following this thread, very much hope maybe you’ve been able to talk to someone about what happened.
Something very similar happened to me earlier this year, and I know the completely overwhelming mass of emotions you must be going through.
As mentioned, Rape Crisis are a really good place to start, speaking to someone on their helpline was the breakthrough for me, it made me realise that all the pain and turmoil I was feeling was justified. It was that lady that first said the ‘R’ word out loud (I still can’t say it), and I felt more able to tell people after that and seek the help I needed.
I’m four months down the line and I recognise so much of what you put in your OP; the panic and fear. It’s hard to talk about to someone who hasn’t experienced it, and telling someone for the first time is terrifying. How are they going to react, will they believe me?
I wish you lots of luck OP, please get help if you feel able. Don’t live with this on your own xx