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TW- coping with examinations and birth - history of sexual assault

2 replies

Mazekeen · 24/08/2019 17:29

I'm not sure this is the right place to post this, but I'm lost. If you can think of a better or more appropriate place please do let me know.

I am wondering if any other Mums or Mums to be can offer any advice. I am struggling with the idea of getting through pregnancy examinations and then birth, because I have a history of serious sexual assault and it has left me traumatised. Whenever I have to be examined I tense up and freak out, intimate exams have been practically impossible for me since.
I have already disclosed my history to my midwife - she seems very understanding- but I am still worried that I just won't be able to submit to the exams that I know I should have. It's a kind of PTSD and I have flashbacks and lash-out when in those situations.
I really don't want to allow the inhuman skidmark that did this to me to ruin the experience of becoming a mother for me, and I don't want to endanger my unborn child by not having the exams I need, but how do you cope? I know I can have all feamle staff and my husband can stay with me, but these things just don't help.
I'm so scared.

OP posts:
MoaningMinnie1 · 24/08/2019 17:35

Oh bless you, I really don't have any advice but knew someone who felt the same as you because of childhood abuse. She did manage to get over it, if that is any help, and has had two children.

FlowersFlowers

Leavingthebeginning · 24/08/2019 22:47

My Body Back have set up a maternity clinic for exactly these circumstances. Not sure if they are near you, but might be useful to have a read through.

www.mybodybackproject.com/our-maternity-clinics/

Congratulations on your pregnancy, you will get through this, but definitely reach out for the support that’s available.

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