Does anyone know if you can get counselling or similar on the nhs?
I’m just finding it all really tough at the moment and thinking back on stuff I’ve been on a rollercoaster of ups and downs the last 17 years when I had a fairly major traumatic incident occur that changed my life in a fairly significant way. At the time I just became quite hard I guess and didn’t show much emotion usually but it would take the smallest thing to trigger me off which was really out of proportion to the event if that makes sense?
It now seems the downs are now lasting longer than the highs and it’s sucking all the enjoyment out of things. I feel good for a short time then back to shit again. I go between feeling numb, feeling rage and anger to feeling just about ok. Then periods of happy but then the lows hit again. I’ve also been told I seem like I don’t give a shit about things and sometimes I don’t and other times I really do care. I’ve been told I’m obsessive about certain things that doesn’t make sense to care about.
I don’t really know where to go from here but I really feel I haven’t given my children the best because of this and feel like I’m failing them and that it’s rubbing off on them as they don’t really seem to know how to manage their emotions all that well either and have emotional outbursts (though that could be their age at 11 and 5).
My husband doesn’t really understand and when he tries to “help” he does it by making jokes about the significant event or even says it can’t be as bad as I make out. I didn’t even know him then as I was 16 at the time.
Thank you if you’ve read this and have tried to advise in some way