I’m in a psychiatric intensive care unit, I’ve been here a week now. It’s hard work, the other patients are very loud and I’m not. I made a serious attempt on my life on the weekend and stopped breathing, had seizures etc (went to general hospital by ambulance and improved so came back here) and have been on 1:1 but now instead they’re just locking me out of my room all day, and I’m hiding in the ‘quiet room’ all day. I had a friend here for a week but she’s leaving tomorrow morning. I’m here for another week or two and then I’m going back to the acute ward.
Just looking for some support. It’s hard being in hospital, and I’m quite far away from home so my family can’t visit, and to make matters worse my little boy (7) broke his collarbone yesterday and I feel bad for being in hospital and not with him. And I know if I died I wouldn’t be with him either, it’s complicated feeling like this.
My CPN is off until Thursday so she doesn’t know what’s gone on, she was at work last Friday and that was the first she had been told about me being moved to a PICU, and she’s not happy about it. It’s a short stay ward so patients don’t stay for longer than 2/3 weeks so I can’t do hardly any therapy which was the point of me coming here, so the whole experience is pointless.
I’m just fed up really. My husband is doing a great job looking after our children at least.