Is this postpartum depression?

[sallycinnamonn]

I'm suffering with serve health anxiety surrounding dd, feeling guilty for things surrounding her that are out of my control or can't be changed, can't sleep at night due to these thoughts. Feeling like a bad mum even though its unreasonable for me to feel like that.

I tried to speak to my health visitor about this but she just shrugged it off, I'm 12 weeks pp so it's not just baby blues. I'm scared to talk to a doctor about it because even though I know ppd is normal, I'm scared they will take my baby away and think I'm a bad mother. I know that's irrational but part of me can't help but feel it. I'm so run down by these feelings, constant headaches from the crying all night and not sleeping.

Is this ppd? And if so, can I have advice on where to go from here

Please talk to your GP and be completely honest with them - it’s impossible to diagnose someone over the Internet but the thoughts you’re describing do sound a lot like post natal depression and/or anxiety (which is also common but less known about). There is help out there, and you don’t have to suffer like this. I totally understand the fear of people thinking you’re a bad mother but I promise you, the best thing you can do for your baby is ask for help. No one will take your baby away because you asked for help - they want to support you to be the best mum to her that you can be and get you feeling like yourself again.

I found it really hard to ask for help for some of the same reasons but I’m so glad I did - I didn’t really realise how bad things were until I started getting better. Most importantly, no one has said I’m a bad mum and I’m actually enjoying my baby now.

I’m so sorry your health visitor wasn’t helpful, but don’t let it put you off seeing the GP.

Can you confide in anyone - a partner, your mum, a friend - who could support you to seek help? I have a tendency to put on a good front, and I had similar worries about being a bad mum / not deserving help, so my partner came with me to the GP to make sure I went through with it (he came in, briefly explained to the GP what I’d come to see her about, then left so I had the actual consultation privately).

It’s so hard to do when you’re feeling like this, but it’s so worth it!

It could be PND. You need to talk to your GP, ASAP.

Some definite similarities to my post natal depression . Get to the doctor and speak honestly . I was so worried about getting a diagnosis but it made a massive difference . Sending you a hug .